I hate myself what can i do

‘I Hate Myself’: 8 Ways to Combat Self-Hatred

Rachel Goldman, PhD FTOS, is a licensed psychologist, clinical assistant professor, speaker, wellness expert specializing in eating behaviors, stress management, and health behavior change.

Verywell / Laura Porter

Do you often have the thought, «I hate myself»? If you are filled with feelings of self-hatred, you know how frustrating they can be. Not only does self-hatred limit what you can achieve in life, but it also worsens mental health conditions such as anxiety and depression.

In order to get over feelings of self-hatred, it’s important to recognize the signs and symptoms, understand the underlying causes and triggers, realize the powerful effects it has on your life, and finally, make a plan to get over those feelings of self-hatred and develop healthy coping skills to feel better.

Signs of Self-Hatred

Below are some of the tell-tale signs that you might be living with self-hatred, beyond having occasional negative self-talk.

Causes of Self-Hatred

If those signs sounded all too familiar, you’re probably wondering why you hate yourself and how you ended up here. You might not immediately know the answers to these questions, so it’s important to take some time to reflect. Below are some possible causes to consider.

It’s important to remember that not everyone who experiences self-hatred will have had the same life experiences. There is no singular path that leads to thinking, «I hate myself.» Consider your unique circumstances and what might have brought you to this point.

Negative Inner Critic

If you are thinking «I hate myself,» chances are that you have a negative inner critic who constantly puts you down. This critical voice might compare you to others or tell you that you are not good enough.

You might feel as though you are different from other people and that you don’t measure up. These thoughts may leave you feeling like an outcast or a fraud when you are with other people.

The inner critic is like a frenemy who is intent on undermining your success. This voice in your head is filled with self-hate, and can also evolve into paranoia and suspiciousness if you listen long enough. The inner critic doesn’t want you to experience success, so it will even cut you down when you do accomplish something good.

The following are some things your inner critic might say:

If you have a voice in your head like this, you might come to believe that these types of critical thoughts are the truth. If the voice tells you that you are worthless, stupid, or unattractive, you might eventually come to believe those things. And with those thoughts, comes the belief that you aren’t worthy of love, success, confidence, or the chance to make mistakes.

The more you listen to that critical inner voice, the more power you give to it. In addition, you might eventually start to project your own insecurities onto other people, leaving you paranoid, suspicious, and unable to accept love and kindness. If this sounds like you, then chances are that you have been listening to your negative inner critic for far too long.

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Where does that negative inner critic come from? It isn’t likely that you developed that voice in your head all by yourself. Rather, most often, the negative inner critic arises from past negative life experiences. These could be childhood experiences with your parents, bullying from peers, or even the outcome of a bad relationship.

Childhood Experiences

Did you grow up with parents who were critical of you? Or did you have a parent who seemed to be stressed, angry, or tense, and who made you feel as though you needed to walk on eggshells?

If so, you may have learned to be quiet and fade into the background. Childhood experiences or trauma such as abuse, neglect, being over-controlled, or being criticized can all lead to the development of a negative inner voice.

Bad Relationships

Not all critical inner voices begin during childhood. If you were in a relationship or friendship with someone who engaged in the same types of behaviors, the experience could also have created a negative inner voice.

This could even include a work relationship with a co-worker or supervisor with a tendency to put you down or make you feel inferior. Any type of relationship has the potential to set a negative tone in your mind and create a negative inner voice that’s hard to shake.

Bullying

Were you the victim of bullying in school, at work, or in another relationship? Even transient relationships with people can create lasting memories that impact your self-concept and affect your self-esteem.

If you find yourself having flashback memories of seemingly insignificant events with bullies from your past or present, it could be that the experience has had a long-lasting effect on your mind. If your negative inner voice replays the words of your real-life bullies, you have some deeper work to do to release those thoughts rather than internalize them.

Traumatic Events

Have you experienced any traumatic life events like a car accident, physical attack, or significant loss? If so, the loss might leave you wondering, «why me?» which can evolve into feelings of shame or regret, particularly if you feel you were somehow at fault.

Environmental Triggers

Long after original events, you might find yourself being triggered by things that happen in your daily life. For example, a new co-worker might remind you of a past bad experience at work, or a new friend might trigger an unpleasant memory from your childhood.

If you find yourself having an emotional reaction to a situation that seems out of proportion to what has happened, you may need to do more work to uncover the things that are holding you back. Many find this process is made easier with the help of a therapist or other mental health professional.

Negative Self-Concept

Do you have a negative self-concept, poor self-image, or low self-esteem? When you have thoughts of self-hatred, small problems can be magnified into much larger ones. You may feel as though the bad things that happen are a reflection of your own inherent «badness.»

For example, you’re at a party and you tell a joke that falls flat. Instead of rolling with the punches and moving on, your negative self-concept might induce a spiral into negative thoughts such as «everyone hates me» and «I’ll never be able to make any friends.»

Mental Health Conditions

A feeling of self-hatred could also be the result of a mental health condition such as depression or anxiety. Depression, for example, can cause symptoms such as hopelessness, guilt, and shame, which can make you feel as though you are not good enough. Unfortunately, the nature of depression also means that you are unable to see through this cognitive bias to recognize that it is your depression that is making you think this way.

The more that your condition influences your thoughts, the more likely it is that you will start to see this negative view of yourself as your reality. This can leave you feeling as though you are not worthy and do not belong. You may feel isolated and different from everyone else.

Outcomes of Self-Hatred

Beyond the causes of self-hatred, it’s important to understand the outcomes that can result when your thoughts continually reinforce that self-hatred. Below are some potential outcomes:

Many of the outcomes of self-hatred are similar to the signs of self-hatred. In this way, it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy from which you cannot easily escape. As long as you stay in this cycle of self-hatred, you’ll never move forward. But with help, you can break the cycle.

If you are having suicidal thoughts or thoughts of self harm, contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 988 for support and assistance from a trained counselor. If you or a loved one are in immediate danger, call 911.

For more mental health resources, see our National Helpline Database.

How to Combat Self-Hatred

If you are looking to get over self-hatred, there are a number of things you can do to break the cycle. Above all else, remember that you are not to blame for how you feel, but you are responsible from this day forward for the actions that you take toward making positive changes.

Try Journaling

Keep a journal to reflect on your day and how you felt about what happened. Reflect on the events of the day, examine situations that may have triggered certain emotions, and be mindful of the root causes of any feelings of self-hatred.

As you journal each day, look for patterns and aim to become more aware of how your emotions shift. Research shows that expressive writing such as journaling can help to reduce psychological distress.

Talk Back to Your Inner Critic

As you start to become more aware of your emotions and their triggers, try to identify the thoughts that you have when faced with negative events. Ask yourself questions about whether your thoughts are realistic, or whether you are engaging in thought distortions.

Try standing up to your inner bully by countering that inner voice with arguments to the contrary. If you find it hard to build up a strong voice on your own, imagine yourself taking on the role of a stronger person you know—such as a friend, famous person, or superhero—and talking back to the critical voice in your head.

Practice Self-Compassion

Instead of hating yourself, practice showing yourself compassion. This means looking at situations in a different light, seeing the good things that you have accomplished, and ending black-or-white thinking. What would you say to a friend or loved one who was having similar thoughts about themselves?

Was that one bad thing that happened really the end of the world? Could you reframe the situation to see it as a setback instead of a catastrophe? When you can be kinder to yourself, you’ll open yourself up to more positive feelings and a positive inner voice. Research shows that compassion-focused therapy can improve self-esteem, which could be helpful to reduce self-hatred.

Spend Time With Positive People

Instead of hanging out with people who make you feel bad, start hanging out with people who make you feel good. If you don’t have any positive people your everyday life, consider joining a support group. If you aren’t sure where to find one, the National Alliance on Mental Illness is a good place to start, regardless of what type of mental health issues you might be facing.

Practice Meditation

If you find it hard to slow down and detach yourself from your negative thinking, try starting a regular meditation practice. Engaging in meditation is a way to shut off the negative voice in your head. It’s also like a muscle; the more that you practice, the easier that it will be to quiet your mind and let go of negative thoughts.

See a Therapist

If you are struggling with your mental health, you might benefit from seeing a therapist. While it’s possible to shift your mindset on your own, a therapist can help you deal with past trauma more quickly and guide you to more helpful thinking patterns.

Take Care of Yourself

Instead of engaging in self-destructive behaviors, engage in self-care. This approach means taking care of your physical and mental health by doing all the things that will keep you feeling good. Eat healthy food, get regular exercise, get enough sleep, reduce social media and screen time, spend time in nature, and talk kindly to yourself, to name a few examples.

Move Toward Living the Life You Want

The antidote to feeling bad all the time might be to start taking small steps toward what you want in life. That might mean finding a new career path, traveling, getting out of debt, ending a relationship, starting a family, or moving far away. Determine your values and then start acting in accordance with them. Once you start to align with your values, it will be easier to feel confident in yourself.

A Word From Verywell

It’s easy to think that you are the only one who struggles with thoughts of self-hatred. The truth is that many people feel the same way that you do, and there are ways to get past it.

If you’re still struggling to get over these feelings, it could be that an underlying mental health issue is contributing to your negative thinking patterns. If you haven’t already been assessed by a mental health professional, this should be your first step. If you are diagnosed with a mental disorder, this could be the starting point to finally making positive changes in your life.

On the other hand, if you don’t have a diagnosable disorder, or if you have already seen a mental health professional and are receiving treatment, then your best course of action is to follow through with your treatment plan and consider trying some of the above-mentioned set of coping strategies to manage your negative thinking.

If this feels hard, you might benefit from an accountability partner or someone else who will check in with you regularly to make sure that you are keeping up with your positive habits. While it might feel hard to confide in someone that you need help, you also might be surprised at how willing others will be to help when you ask.

There’s no reason to keep living your life with the thoughts about hating yourself. Today, you can take the first step toward feeling better and living a life that isn’t filled with self-hatred and negative thought patterns.

What To Do When You Hate Yourself: No Bullsh*t Advice

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Speak to an accredited and experienced therapist to help you overcome the hate you have for yourself. Simply click here to connect with one via BetterHelp.com.

You don’t like the person who stares back at you when you look in the mirror.

You’d go so far as to say you hate that person.

And before you read any further, tell yourself that as of this moment in time, it’s okay to feel that way.

Too many people will tell you that you’re wrong to hate yourself…

…that you have so much to live for.

…that you are a beautiful person.

…that you can be whatever you want to be.

And other such well-meaning statements or comments.

The problem is: this is not how you feel right now.

And while there is some truth in each of those statements, it’s not something you are able to accept or believe.

By telling you that you are wrong to hate yourself, these people are missing the point entirely.

And, if anything, they might be making you feel worse.

After all, nobody likes to have their feelings invalidated. Nobody wants to be told that they are wrong for feeling the way they feel.

So as you read through this article, remember this one thing:

If, at this precise moment, you hate yourself, own that feeling. Don’t allow other people to trivialize your feeling. And don’t allow your own mind to trivialize your feeling.

Your feeling is real.

Your feeling is hard.

Your feeling is something that you know better than anyone else – even those who may have suffered (or are still suffering) in a similar way.

Now, let’s continue.

In this article, we’ll explore some of the more common reasons why you may be experiencing feelings of self-hatred.

We’ll look at the ways that this might manifest in your life and the self-reinforcing behaviors that result.

And we’ll discuss some potential avenues for what to do if you hate yourself, in terms of unpacking those emotions and overcoming them.

Let’s first ask why…

Why Do I Hate Myself?

When you reach a point of self-loathing in your life, it can be hard to figure out how you got there.

Perhaps you have felt this way for as long as you can remember. Or maybe it’s something that has grown over time.

But where did it come from, this feeling of self-hatred?

It’s important to note that the following points should only be taken as possible reasons why you think about yourself in the ways that you do.

You might find some answers here or you might not.

If something you read does feel relevant to your situation, it may bring you some form of relief.

But please be aware that there is also the risk that it might trigger further unhealthy feelings.

If this should happen, please stop reading and seek direct help from a qualified therapist or counselor at your earliest opportunity. They will be able to provide support in a safe and caring environment.

If you are in crisis and believe you may pose a risk to yourself, please stop reading and contact the crisis lifeline on 1-800-273-8255.

How You Think About Yourself Is Highly Critical

You may hate yourself because you criticize every aspect of yourself.

Perhaps this sounds obvious to you. Of course you criticize yourself – you hate yourself.

But what came first: the hate or the criticism?

As you read the rest of this article, you’ll see why this question is so important. Because not all criticism comes from within.

You may hate the way you look or the fact that you think you’re boring or stupid or any number of other things…

…but there’s a good chance that at least some of this criticism began as an external influence in your life.

In other words, another person said negative things about you and to you.

But we’ll return to that later on. For now, let’s stick with the point that you are, right here and now, highly critical of yourself.

This is because the way you think about yourself as a person is misaligned with reality.

In psychology, the term self-concept is used to include all the ways that you think about yourself: your self-image, your self-esteem, and your ideal self (the person you wish you could be).

These 3 things all interact with each other, and in your case, they may negatively reinforce one another.

Perhaps you think you’re ugly (negative self-image) which makes you feel unlovable (self-esteem), and you wish you could be more attractive (your ideal self).

But every time you wish you could be more attractive, you feed the idea that you are ugly and the resulting feelings of being unlovable.

Eventually, you are no longer able to see the honest reality of your situation because this negative feedback loop has shifted your opinion of yourself to the very far end of every spectrum.

“I’m unattractive” becomes “I’m so ugly that nobody will ever want to be with me.”

“I’m not the smartest” becomes “I’m so stupid that nobody would ever hire me.”

“I’m shy and reserved” becomes “I’m so boring that nobody wants to hang out with me.”

“I’ve not achieved what I wanted” becomes “I’m such a failure in every way.”

Yes, there will be people who are – from a stereotypical point of view – more attractive that you.

Yes, there will be people who are – on an academic level – smarter than you.

Yes, there will be people who are more outgoing and more adventurous than you.

And, yes, there will be people who are – from a lifestyle and wealth perspective – more successful than you.

This probably is your reality. Yet you see things as far worse than that. You don’t see any redeeming features in yourself whatsoever.

So you hate yourself because you don’t see anything worth liking.

Remember this as you continue reading. Everything comes back to how you see yourself.

You Had An Unhealthy Upbringing

What do we mean by an ‘unhealthy’ upbringing?

Primarily, this refers to parents or guardians who were unable to provide the caring and supportive environment that a young person thrives in.

A person’s self-concept is largely formed during their childhood years.

If you were raised in a situation where people’s attitudes and behaviors toward you were negative or even abusive, it is likely to be an important reason why you have feelings of self-hatred now.

If you had a parent or parents who often expressed their disappointment in you, for example, you may have developed perfectionist tendencies.

This might lead to you never feeling content with what you achieve or have. You may see yourself as a failure and eventually come to hate yourself for it.

A parent who repeatedly rejected your desire for attention may have directly led to your feelings of being unworthy of love.

A parent who regularly reminded you of your weight or some other aspect of your appearance is a likely cause of such insecurities you now hold.

A parent who was controlling and dictated what you did might have left you feeling helpless and unable to look after yourself.

We put so much importance on the way our parents treat us. They are, after all, the people we look up to when we’re younger. They are the ones we expect to care for us.

When they fail to treat us in a healthy and loving way, it can sow the seeds of future self-hatred.

You Were Bullied (Or Are Being Bullied)

Bullying is essentially an attack on a person’s self-concept. A bully identifies a self-defined weakness and then keeps chipping away at it again and again.

A bully’s physical violence may cause us pain, and their words may leave unseen scars too.

Being bullied as a child can have a long-lasting effect on a person’s mental well-being.

It can go unnoticed or unreported for a long time, which leaves the victim in a situation where they often accept the views or opinions of the bully as valid and correct because no one tells them otherwise.

This comes right back to your self-concept and how an episode of bullying can change it.

Even after the bullies have gone or given up, their words and their actions will remain in your mind, undermining your self-belief, confidence, and sense of self-worth.

Of course, bullying is not confined to the playground. It can happen at work, in friendships (if you can call them friends), in romantic relationships, and amongst family members.

There is no age limit on bullying and its effects are no less devastating in adulthood.

If you were bullied – or if you are being bullied – it may help explain why you feel like hating yourself.

You Experienced A Traumatic Event Of Another Kind

Life can sometimes put us in the way of terrible events that leave us changed.

These events may be fleeting, but they can cause us to question everything we thought we are, were, or might be in the future.

Car accidents, natural disasters, acts of terrorism, physically or sexually violent attacks, sudden bereavement, and the loss of work are just some examples.

Perhaps the scars are solely emotional, or maybe there are physical implications too.

Either way, the turmoil caused by such events can be deep and lasting.

Suddenly, you are no longer the person you thought you were. Your self-concept is smashed to pieces and you don’t like what you now see in the mirror.

You may end up asking questions such as “Why me?” and “What did I do to deserve this?”

And even the search for answers can lead you down a dark path toward self-hatred.

You Did Something You Now Regret

We all do things that we later come to regret, but if you have done something which you now view with a level of shame and disgust, it can make you hate yourself.

Were you unfaithful to your partner?

Did you physically or emotionally abuse another person?

Did you lie or steal or cheat in some way?

Whatever you did, if the thought of it now repulses you, it’s highly likely to leave you hating yourself.

How Self-Hatred Affects You And Your Life

In this section, we’ll explore a number of ways in which hating yourself impacts your mental health, how you behave, and the choices that you make.

We’ll pay special attention to how those things reinforce your feelings and cause your self-esteem and self-worth to spiral downward.

Read this section carefully and ask yourself whether they are true in your life. This will help you in the final section about stopping these feelings of self-hatred.

Your Self-Talk Is Very Negative

When you dislike the person you are, it is reflected in how you speak to yourself and about yourself.

“I hate myself” is, itself, an example of negative self-talk. Any thought that attacks a part of you or all of you is a result of your self-hatred.

“I have awful skin.”

“I have nothing interesting to say.”

Just watch your thoughts for any statement that starts with “I” or “I’m” and which is followed by something negative.

Or these thoughts might also take the form of wholly defeatist statements such as:

“What’s the point?”

“It’ll only end badly if I try.”

These types of thoughts are self-reinforcing. In other words, the more you think them, the more you believe them, and the more likely you are to think them again.

It’s a vicious cycle of destructive overthinking.

You Engage In Self-Destructive Behavior

When you hate yourself, it’s very likely that your actions will reflect this feeling.

You will behave in ways that serve to harm your physical or mental well-being or sabotage your life prospects in another way.

Perhaps you self-harm or numb the pain with alcohol or drugs.

Maybe you eat too much or too little.

You might try to lock yourself away from the outside world and minimize any social contact whatsoever.

Or you could neglect to look after yourself in some other way.

Yet while these behaviors may provide temporary comfort and relief, they only cause you to hate yourself more in the long run.

You Choose Friends Or Partners Who Mistreat You

When you have low self-worth, you become prone to picking people to be in your life who are not kind to you.

Whether it’s the friends you hang out with or the partner you enter into a relationship with, these people are likely to treat you poorly.

They may take advantage of you, bully you, verbally or physically abuse you, take you for granted, or act in other unhealthy and unhelpful ways toward you.

Every time you are confronted with such behavior, you tell yourself that you deserve it (more negative self-talk). You don’t stand up for yourself and you don’t feel like you have the power to change how they act.

When people treat you so badly, it only serves to confirm the view you already have in your mind – namely the “I hate myself” thought and feeling.

You Feel Anxious About Making Any Life Choices

Self-hatred is very often accompanied by low self-confidence. This leaves you feeling anxious whenever you are faced with a decision that may affect your life.

Even small decisions that won’t have any great lasting effect can leave you feeling fearful.

You have a toxic relationship with failure because any failure only serves to reinforce how useless and worthless you think you are.

You worry about disappointing others and not living up to their expectations of you.

And if you have a perfectionist mindset, no choice you make is ever likely to satisfy you because you will always wonder how you might have done better.

You may even feel paralyzed by the choice in front of you, unable to make a decision. This also makes you feel worse about yourself because you believe it shows just how pathetic and incapable you are.

You Don’t Believe Positive Statements Made About You

When you hold feelings of hatred toward yourself, it becomes almost impossible to accept anything positive that someone might say to or about you.

You believe that when other people praise you, recognize something good that you’ve done, compliment you, or are just nice to you in some way, that they are being dishonest or insincere.

After all, how can they really mean these things when you know, deep down, how useless and undeserving you are?

Maybe you think that they pity you and are simply trying to make you feel better.

Or maybe you believe that this is a form of manipulation to get you to do something for them.

Either way, you don’t believe what they say and this confirms to you that you are not worth genuine kindness or praise.

You Feel Unable To Follow Your Dreams

If you do still have any dreams, you feel completely incapable of chasing them and making them a reality.

You doubt your abilities. You doubt your commitment. You doubt your willpower. You doubt everything that you would need to fulfil the goals you have in life.

And neither do you believe that you deserve to have these dreams come true. In your mind, that sort of thing is reserved for people who are ‘better’ than you.

Yet, by not following your dreams, you risk strengthening your feelings of self-loathing.

Every time a dream fades, you see a future that is more and more bleak.

When your future looks bleak in your eyes, you turn your thoughts inward and you blame yourself.

You criticize yourself for not trying harder. You get angry at yourself for giving up.

This all fuels your feelings of self-hatred and the cycle starts again.

You Feel Like You Don’t Belong

When you don’t like yourself, you don’t see how anyone else could like you either.

In fact, even if you do have friends, you feel disconnected from them and from your family in some way.

But when you feel like an outcast, the only conclusion you are likely to reach is that there is something ‘wrong’ with you.

And so you believe this thought and your self-concept morphs once more toward this unloved and unlovable figure.

How To Stop Hating Yourself

We really do recommend that you seek professional help from one of the therapists at BetterHelp.com as professional therapy can be highly effective in helping to change your mindset and overcome your self-hate.

In this section, we’ll discuss some of the things that you might do to help move your mindset away from self-hatred and toward self-acceptance.

As you’ll soon realize, each point relates to one of the behaviors from the previous section.

While we do not go into great detail with each point, the information is aimed to give you a starting point from which you can explore further.

But first, four quick notes:

1. Uncovering the root cause(s) of your feelings is not always as straightforward as you’d think.

While exploring your past and examining the possible causes can prove helpful, there is a lot more that a trained therapist or counselor might be able to do.

They know the kinds of questions to ask and the most effective mental paths to guide you down in order to identify when, where, and how these feelings first took root in your mind.

And they might be able to diagnose depression or other mental health issues that need to be addressed at the same time.

So speak to your doctor and tell them how you are feeling. They should then refer you to one of these mental health professionals for further treatment.

2. Changing a behavior is not likely to come easy and nor will it come quickly. That’s why we recommend focusing on one or maybe two things at a time and no more.

If you spread yourself too thin and try to implement all of the advice below at once, you’ll find it more difficult to succeed in each.

Once you feel like you are making good progress in one area, you might then attempt to address another.

3. You are not the only person who currently hates themselves. And many people have hated themselves in the past, but no longer feel that way.

It can feel like you’re alone at times because you may not talk about your feelings with anybody, but you can see by looking at many online forums, message boards, or website comment sections that there are other people who feel a similar way.

This alone can bring you some comfort because it can help you to realize that what you are feeling is not uncommon and also because some messages will come from people who have overcome their feelings.

4. Not all of the points below will directly apply to you. So don’t assume that you have to follow them all.

You might not have any self-destructive behaviors. You may be actively engaged in following your dreams or career. You may have a loving family and set of friends around you.

Hating yourself comes in a variety of forms and can happen to anyone.

Shift Your Negative Self-Talk

If you can break the pattern of negative self-talk, you can slowly begin to change the way you feel about yourself.

As difficult as it may be, if you can challenge each negative thought that arises and give it a neutral or positive spin, you will eventually find that this becomes second nature.

So if the thought, “I’m not good at anything” comes into your mind, challenge it with the thought, “There are many things I could improve upon, but I am better than most people at…” and then fill in the blank.

If you think, “I’m fat and ugly,” challenge this with, “I could lead a healthier lifestyle, but I have nice hair.”

Your new statements should be realistic – there is little value in lying to yourself or being overly optimistic.

If there really are things about you that you don’t like, your thoughts should recognize the changes that could be made, not the current state that you hate so much.

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) can be a very effective form of therapy that can help you address and alter your negative self-talk.

Address Any Self-Destructive Behaviors

If you can stop doing anything that you know is ultimately harmful to you, then you will stop berating yourself for doing those things.

It is highly likely that this is where you will need the assistance of a doctor or other health professional.

Things like addictions or self-harm are not easy to stop by yourself and it may be that some form of medication will really help in your attempts.

Perform An Audit Of Your Inner Circle

The people you spend the most time around will have a huge influence on how you feel about yourself.

If you have friends, family members, work colleagues, or other regular acquaintances who treat you poorly, it is worth asking how you might limit the time you spend with them or remove them from your life entirely.

By not being exposed to these people, you will have fewer reasons to be mean to yourself.

Ask For Help Making Decisions

If you feel anxious whenever you are faced with a choice in life, and especially if you feel unable to make it, try asking a trusted friend or family member for help.

You might feel quite vulnerable and awkward asking someone for help, but if they are someone who treats you well and genuinely cares about you, you’ll probably be surprised at how willing they are to lend a hand.

And when you have the guidance of another person, decisions can feel more manageable and less intimidating.

If you don’t have someone in your life who you feel you can trust or speak to, there are many charities and organizations of all kinds that might be able to help.

Take All Positive Comments Seriously

You may find it difficult to believe someone when they say something nice to you, but make every effort to see these comments as genuine.

One way to achieve this is to ask the person why they are saying that to you. Try not to sound defensive or untrusting when you ask, but reply with something such as:

“Thank you, that’s very kind. But what did I do to deserve such nice words?”

This gives them the chance to go into more detail about what you may have done, or why they think you look nice, or whatever the compliment was.

You then have more information to judge rationally and critically.

You may, at times, still come to the conclusion that someone was just being nice, but you will also encounter instances where the evidence really does point toward you having deserved the praise or recognition.

Take Small Steps Toward A Dream Or Goal

A great way to feel more positively toward yourself is to achieve something that matters to you.

At the present moment in time, you may not feel able to reach your goals or dreams, so don’t even think about that for now.

Instead, take something tiny that you might be able to do today that will eventually contribute to that goal or dream.

Let’s say your dream is to open your own bakery. That’s a far off end point, yes, but it doesn’t stop you from sitting down and brainstorming names for your bakery.

You’ll probably really enjoy this small task and if you find a name that you like, you’ll feel a sense of achievement and it will make the dream more real.

Whatever your goal is, just try to take a tiny piece of it at a time and celebrate when you’ve taken each step.

Find A Tribe Of ‘Your People’

The way to combat feeling like you don’t belong anywhere is to find at least one or two people with whom you really do share something in common.

This could be something you share physically, such as a body shape or disability.

It could be something you really enjoy doing, such as a hobby or pastime.

Or it could be a dream you both have, such as wanting to start your own businesses.

You may not know these people yet, so it’s your task to find out where they might be and get to know them.

Or you may know them casually, but not yet call them a friend – in which case, your job is to find ways to interact with them more.

A Final Thought

In this article we’ve done three things: we’ve explored the potential causes for your feelings, we’ve talked about how these feelings can be self-reinforcing, and we’ve looked at some ways you can stop feeling them.

“I hate myself” is a thought that crosses many people’s minds. Your struggle is real, but it is one that you can be victorious over.

One key message is that you don’t have to struggle alone. There are people and organizations who can help you face down your feelings.

So, as much as this article is designed to help educate you, we would advise you to speak directly to someone wherever possible.

Just be wary of well-wishers who may inadvertently diminish your feelings.

Still not sure what to do when you hate yourself? Talking to someone can really help you to address and fix this issue. It’s a great way to get your thoughts and your worries out of your head so you can work through them.

A therapist is often the best person you can talk to. Why? Because they are trained to help people in situations like yours. They can guide you and help you to explore the many layers there are bound to be to your self-hatred.

A good place to get professional help is the website BetterHelp.com – here, you’ll be able to connect with a therapist via phone, video, or instant message.

While you may try to work through this yourself, it may be a bigger issue than self-help can address. And if it is affecting your mental well-being, relationships, or life in general, it is a significant thing that needs to be resolved.

Too many people try to muddle through and do their best to overcome issues that they never really get to grips with. If it’s at all possible in your circumstances, therapy is 100% the best way forward.

Online therapy is actually a good option for many people. It’s more convenient than in-person therapy and is more affordable in a lot of cases. And you get access to the same level of qualified and experienced professional.

Click here if you’d like to learn more about the service BetterHelp.com provide and the process of getting started.

You’ve already taken the first step just by searching for and reading this article. The worst thing you can do right now is nothing. The best thing is to speak to a therapist. The next best thing is to implement everything you’ve learned in this article by yourself. The choice is yours.

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«Hate Myself» lyrics

NF Lyrics

I don’t see you like I should
You look so misunderstood
And I wish I could help
But it’s hard when I hate myself
Pray to God with my arms open
If this is it then I feel hopeless
And I wish I could help
But it’s hard when I hate myself

Late nights are the worst for me
They bring out the worst in me
Mind running, got me feeling like it hurts to think
If this is all that I wanted, I don’t want it
Gotta be more for me
More than core beliefs, and every morning I wake up
And feel like I am not worth it ’cause I’m at war with peace
I go to Hell, welcome to the corpse of me
Look at the body like you ain’t nothin’ but poor and weak
It’s kinda weird, lately I’ve been feeling like the only way
For me to get away is if I poured a drink
That’s more deceit, more defeat
Is this really what I’m born to be?
That’s what you get for thinking you’re unique
So poor but I’m so wealthy
Need help but you can’t help me
What else can the world sell me? Tell me
Lies, I still buy ’em like they’re goin’ out of stock
But it’s not healthy

I don’t see you like I should
You look so misunderstood
And I wish I could help
But it’s hard when I hate myself
Pray to God with my arms open
If this is it then I feel hopeless
And I wish I could help
But it’s hard when I hate myself

Yeah, late nights get the best of me
They know how to get to me
Suicide thoughts come and go like a guest to me
But I don’t wanna die, I just wanna get relief
So don’t talk to me like you think I’m so successful
What is success when hope has left you?
I am not a spokesman, I’m a broken record
Whose sick of doin’ interviews ’cause I hate myself, ah
Come across like it’s so easy
But I feel like you don’t need me
When I feel like you don’t need me
Then I feel like you don’t see me
And my life has no meaning, dreaming
Hands out, tryna ask for love
But when I get it I just pass it up
Throw it away and think about it later
Diggin’ through the trash for drugs
I wish I could give you what you needed
But I can’t I’m scared because

I don’t see you like I should
You look so misunderstood
And I wish I could help
But it’s hard when I hate myself
Pray to God with my arms open
If this is it then I feel hopeless
And I wish I could help
But it’s hard when I hate myself

I walk through the ashes of my passions
Reminiscin’ with the baggage in my casket
Get lost in the questions I can’t answer
Can’t stand who I am but it don’t matter
We scream to be free but I stay captured
Knee deep in defeat of my own actions
Feel weak but the peace that I keep lacking
Keeps speaking to me but I can’t have it

But I can’t have it
Keeps speaking to me but I can’t have it
But I can’t have it
Keeps speaking to me but I can’t have it

I don’t see you like I should
You look so misunderstood
And I wish I could help
But it’s hard when I hate myself
Pray to God with my arms open
If this is it then I feel hopeless
And I wish I could help
But it’s hard when I hate myself
Hate myself
But it’s hard when I hate myself
Hate myself
But it’s hard when I hate myself

And I hate myself
It’s kind of hard when I hate myself
I hate myself
It’s hard when I hate myself

30 I Hate Myself Quotes That Express Your Inner Feelings

Are you one of those people who feel miserable inside and have this tragic feeling of hating yourself? Then you are at the right place. This article about I hate myself quotes will explain your feelings the best. Remember, you are not alone in this and a lot of other people also go through the same situation as you.

It’s okay to express your feelings and vent out the darkness prevailing inside you. There are certain times in your life when nothing feels right and there is negativity all around. This is when you start hating yourself and start holding yourself responsible for everything bad in your life. When relationships fail, when you cannot perform up to everyone’s expectations or people start treating you bad for whatever reasons, you start hating yourself.
People with low self-esteem are the first ones to hate themselves because they feel miserable for being who they are and hate their existence. Depression takes over them and they engage in self-loathing behavior. Hating yourself is the worst form of depression where everything around yourself carries no importance for you because you have lost interest in everything; even your own self!

I hate myself quotes

Here is a collection of I hate myself quotes to empathize with you. A list of 30+ I hate myself quotes that will help you share your inner pain with your friends or anyone.

I’m not important. Everyone will do just fine without me.

I hate myself more than I hate others. I’m miserly egoistic even with hate.

I don’t hate you for not loving me anymore, but i hate myself for still loving you.

I hate myself for loving you…

I hate people who break their promises, but sometimes I hate myself more for once believed in their sweet words and lies.

I get into these moods where I hate myself, I hate life and I hate the people around me. I don’t know why…

I don’t really care what you think about me because it’s guaranteed that you’ll never be able to hate me more than I hate myself, so go ahead.

I hate myself. Holding onto someone who’s not worth it and letting someone who actually cared.

Don’t you ever wonder if God gets really hurt? When you say, ‘i hate myself’ or ‘I’m ugly’ but he spent so much time creating you…

Trust gets you killed, love gets you hurt and being real gets you hated. All worth it.

Why should I love myself? No one else does!

Pretty people that call themselves ugly are the reason i hate myself even more.

Special, I wish you were special. But I can’t think of you that way. Want me, I need you to want me. i hate myself, but that’s ok.

I just hate feeling like this. i hate myself, for being ugly, fat, horrible, a weirdo, a freak, a bitch.

I’m fat. I’m ugly. I’m worthless. I’m useless. I’m depressed. I’m not ok. I want to die. I hate myself.

No one cares. They’re just pretending!

If you give up on me, I’m going to give up on me too.

I am ruined. I am wrecked. I am dead. I turned out to be a terrible person.

It’s crazy how much one person can f*ck you up, mentally.

I hate myself because I am not beautiful. I hate myself because I am fat.

Sometimes I hate you, sometimes I hate myself, but always I miss you.

No one could ever hate me as much as I hate myself, okay? So any mean thing someone’s gonna think of to say about me, I’ve already said to me, about me, probably in the last half hour!

These I hate myself quotes will give you a moment of self-reflection when you can actually think that these are exactly my thoughts and hence, you can do conscious efforts to change them. Getting out of anxiety is not that difficult and you can make that happen when you realize that it is dangerous for me.

People even use I hate myself quotes to make others sympathize with them and feel bad for them. By keeping these quotes as a status or sharing it on their social media profile, people gather attention and tell the world that we are feeling miserable inside. But this article gives you a different approach. Use these I hate myself quotes to feel better about yourself and don’t let the depression overpower you.

Share these with your friends who are in the same situation like you.

Перевод NF – Hate Myself

Текст :

I don’t see you like I should
You look so misunderstood
And I wish I could help
But it’s hard when I hate myself
Pray to God with my arms open
If this is it then I feel hopeless
And I wish I could help
But it’s hard when I hate myself

Late nights are the worst for me
They bring out the worst in me
Mind running, got me feeling like it hurts to think
If this is all that I wanted, I don’t want it
Gotta be more for me
More than core beliefs, and every morning I wake up
And feel like I am not worth it ’cause I’m at war with peace
I go to Hell, welcome to the corpse of me
Look at the body like you ain’t nothin’ but poor and weak
It’s kinda weird, lately I’ve been feeling like the only way
For me to get away is if I poured a drink
That’s more deceit, more defeat
Is this really what I’m born to be?
That’s what you get for thinking you’re unique
So poor but I’m so wealthy
Need help but you can’t help me
What else can the world sell me? Tell me
Lies, I still buy ’em like they’re goin’ out of stock
But it’s not healthy

I don’t see you like I should
You look so misunderstood
And I wish I could help
But it’s hard when I hate myself

Перевод :

Я не вижу тебя, как я должен
Ты выглядишь так неправильно
И я бы хотел помочь
Но трудно, когда я ненавижу себя
Молись Богу с открытыми руками
Если это так, то я чувствую себя безнадежно
И я бы хотел помочь
Но трудно, когда я ненавижу себя

Поздние ночи – худшее для меня
Они выявляют во мне худшее
Ум бегает, у меня такое чувство, что мне больно думать
Если это все, что я хотел, я не хочу этого
Должен быть больше для меня
Больше чем основные убеждения, и каждое утро я просыпаюсь
И чувствую, что я не стою этого, потому что я воюю с миром
Я иду в ад, добро пожаловать в труп меня
Посмотри на тело, как будто ты не ничто, а бедный и слабый
Это довольно странно, в последнее время я чувствую себя как единственный способ
Для меня, чтобы уйти, если я налил выпить
Это больше обмана, больше поражения
Это действительно то, что я рожден, чтобы быть?
Это то, что вы получаете, думая, что вы уникальны
Так беден, но я так богат
Нужна помощь, но ты не можешь мне помочь
Что еще мир может продать мне? Скажи-ка
Ложь, я все еще покупаю их, как будто их нет в наличии
Но это не здорово

Я не вижу тебя, как я должен
Ты выглядишь так неправильно
И я бы хотел помочь
Но трудно, когда я ненавижу себя

Yeah, late nights get the best of me
They know how to get to me
Suicide thoughts come and go like a guest to me
But I don’t wanna die, I just wanna get relief
So don’t talk to me like you think I’m so successful
What is success when hope has left you?
I am not a spokesman, I’m a broken wreck
Whose sick of doin’ interviews ’cause I hate myself, ah
Come across like it’s so easy
But I feel like you don’t need me
When I feel like you don’t need me
Then I feel like you don’t see me
And my life has no meaning, dreaming
Hands out, tryna ask for love
But when I get it I just pass it up
Throw it away and think about it later
Diggin’ through the trash for drugs
I wish I could give you what you needed
But I can’t I’m scared because

I don’t see you like I should
You look so misunderstood
And I wish I could help
But it’s hard when I hate myself
Pray to God with my arms open
If this is it then I feel hopeless
And I wish I could help
But it’s hard when I hate myself

I walk through the ashes of my passions
Reminiscin’ with the baggage in my casket
Get lost in the questions I can’t answer
Can’t stand who I am but it don’t matter
We scream to be free but I stay captured
Knee deep in defeat of my own actions
Feel weak but the peace that I keep lacking
Keeps speaking to me but I can’t have it

But I can’t have it
Keeps speaking to me but I can’t have it
But I can’t have it
Keeps speaking to me but I can’t have it

I don’t see you like I should
You look so misunderstood
And I wish I could help
But it’s hard when I hate myself
Pray to God with my arms open
If this is it then I feel hopeless
And I wish I could help
But it’s hard when I hate myself
Hate myself
But it’s hard when I hate myself
Hate myself
But it’s hard when I hate myself

And I hate myself
It’s kind hard when I hate myself
I hate myself
It’s hard when I hate myself

Да, поздние ночи одолели меня
Они знают, как добраться до меня
Мысли о самоубийстве приходят и уходят, как гость для меня
Но я не хочу умирать, я просто хочу получить облегчение
Так что не говорите со мной так, как вы думаете, я настолько успешен
Что такое успех, когда надежда покинула тебя?
Я не представитель, я разбитая крушение
Чей тошнит от “интервью”, потому что я ненавижу себя, ах
Наткнуться, как это так просто
Но я чувствую, что я тебе не нужен
Когда я чувствую, что я тебе не нужен
Тогда я чувствую, что ты меня не видишь
И моя жизнь не имеет смысла, мечтать
Руки, попробуй попросить любовь
Но когда я получаю это, я просто передаю это
Выбросьте это и подумайте об этом позже
Копаться через мусор для наркотиков
Я хотел бы дать вам то, что вам нужно
Но я не могу, я боюсь, потому что

Я не вижу тебя, как я должен
Ты выглядишь так неправильно
И я бы хотел помочь
Но трудно, когда я ненавижу себя
Молись Богу с открытыми руками
Если это так, то я чувствую себя безнадежно
И я бы хотел помочь
Но трудно, когда я ненавижу себя

Я иду сквозь пепел моих страстей
Повторно с багажом в моей шкатулке
Заблудитесь в вопросах, на которые я не могу ответить
Терпеть не могу, кто я, но это не имеет значения
Мы кричим, чтобы быть свободными, но я остаюсь в плену
Колено глубоко в поражении моих собственных действий
Чувствую слабость, но спокойствие, которого мне не хватает
Говорит со мной, но я не могу

Но я не могу иметь это
Говорит со мной, но я не могу
Но я не могу иметь это
Говорит со мной, но я не могу

Я не вижу тебя, как я должен
Ты выглядишь так неправильно
И я бы хотел помочь
Но трудно, когда я ненавижу себя
Молись Богу с открытыми руками
Если это так, то я чувствую себя безнадежно
И я бы хотел помочь
Но трудно, когда я ненавижу себя
Ненавижу себя
Но трудно, когда я ненавижу себя
Ненавижу себя
Но трудно, когда я ненавижу себя

И я ненавижу себя
Это очень тяжело, когда я ненавижу себя
я ненавижу себя
Трудно когда ненавижу себя