That guy destroys psionics

Fanfic / That Guy Destroys Psionics

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Perhaps the only tale of Off the Rails greater than Old Man Henderson and The Ballad of Edgardo. This story focuses on an epic-level Pathfinder group. The plot of their story was that magic had been falling out of use as more people developed psionic powers, and the rest was basically D&D meets X-Men. The narrator played as an elf wizard called Elsimore, and the others were a monk/psionic fist/soul fist, a Wilder, a Magus, and a regular Psion.

The game did not go well. The players were quickly at each other’s throats (well, the Wilder was at Elsimore’s throat, and the Monk and Psion defended her), and when the Big Bad showed up, Elsimore chose an. unorthodox way to defeat him, which resulted in psionics being utterly destroyed at their source. When the DM gave the Big Bad his powers back, Elsimore retreated to his private demiplane, and re-depowers the Big Bad by adding the ‘non-psionic’ trait to it (this isn’t normally possible in the game rules, but the DM had houseruled in ways for psionics to be affected like magic). The DM put the kibosh on that, so Elsimore used an «anti-psionics field» to disable his powers again and had mining constructs in his demiplane swarm the Big Bad to kill him again.

At this point, Elsimore was thrown out of the game. No Rocks Fall, Everyone Dies, just the GM pointing at him, saying «you’re out», and throwing him out of his house.

For more roleplay-derailing madness, see The Ballad of Edgardo.

It can be read here.

Thread: Statting Elsinore (That Guy Destroys Psionics)?

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Spoilers

So I am writing this post in order to try to generate some stats for this famous character.

So essentially I am trying to figure out the stats of the main character from the Pathfinder story That Guy Destroys Psionics.

From what I know, he is some kind of elf wizard. He may or may not be epic level, given that he did not use epic magic at all I do not think so.

On a related note, the game seems to have also predated the actual PF mythic rules, as none of that is mentioned either.

Can anybody help me to stat this character? All aid is appreciated.

EDIT: More research on my end turns him up as 20th level, but not much on particulars.

Spoilers

I know the video, but my knowledge with pathfinder is limited.

Spoilers

I know the video, but my knowledge with pathfinder is limited.

The game is basically 3.5 but with some things filed off and some mechanics more fine tuned and improved.

Spoilers

The game being Pathfinder (even with 3.5 mechanics / spells / feats thrown in), odds are he’s just a straight Wizard 20. School is up for debate, but I would say Universalist fits the bill for a character who seems to want to promote and perpetuate all magic. No familiar is ever mentionend, so he probably went with a bonded object.

For feats, we know he has «item creation feats», and from what he uses it seems obvious to include at least Craft Wand and Craft Wondrous Item on top of the Wizard’s baked in Scribe Scroll. For skills, we know he maxed Knowledge: Planes. Certainly Knowledge: Arcana as well. And Spellcraft. Probably a bunch of other Knowledges. The usual suspects would be Local, Nature, Religion. Also, he’s probably Venerable with the associated stat bonus and penalties for age.

For gear, he certainly has a Headband of Vast Intelligence +6, if not a Headband of Mental Superiority +6.

For spells, he has whatever was name dropped during the video. Anything else is up to the imagination, though he probably went for obvious strong staples.

Echoes of the Multiverse

Where everything is possible.

Post by Ares » Tue Feb 06, 2018 4:45 am

This is just an all purpose thread for fun stories about role-playing games. These can be personal or shared from across the internet.

To start, here’s a few more famous stories some of you might never heard about:

«My heart is as light as a child’s, a feeling I’d nearly forgotten. And by helping those in need, I will be able to keep that feeling alive.»
— Captain Marvel SHAZAM! : Power of Hope (2000)

Want to support me and Echoes of the Multiverse? Follow this link to subscribe or donate.

Post by Ares » Tue Feb 06, 2018 5:32 am

My «Worst Character Concept Ever», submitted to me by a prospective player in a Champions game was going to run (but never got off the ground):

The Superlative (Invincible, Indestructible, etc.) Hammer-Wheel.

The Invincible Hammer-Wheel’s power is that he has hammers for hands and wheels for feet. Or it could have been wheels for hands and hammers for feet. The player himself wasn’t sure, but my mental picture of the character is a man with monster-truck wheels plugged into where is arms should be, who drives up to villains and kicks them with his sledgehammer feet.

Here’s basically how the conversation went:

So whenever people bring up their «worst concept» horror-stories, all I have to say is;

«The Invincible Hammer-Wheel.
He has wheels for hands and hammers for feet.
He was born that way.
He was raised by farm implements.
He lives in the woods.»

Honestly, that campaign was doomed from the start. The other (marginally less awful) character concepts I recieved were:

Batman.. with Guns. Years later when I first saw the Harbinger of Justice, this guy’s concept immediately came to mind.

Japanese demon dressed in full Kabuki costume with flame powers and a cursed katana. No background or heroic motivation, but a damn cool sketch (player in question was an artist). I came across the sketch a while ago, and planned to use it for a writeup of Kagutsuchi, who would have been a Susano Orbatos clone from Masamune’s Shirow’s Orion. However, I seem to have lost the sketch again

Guy with a glove that could launch time-delay explosive «bombs.» This was the video-game geek’s contribution.

Powered-armor guy, basically a man-sized Valkyrie from the Robotech cartoon. This from the Battletech nut.

The funniest part was that I’d pre-planned to have the characters meet up with trying to take on a super-powered arsonist who was holding the city hostage. I can’t imagine how this assemblage of characters would’ve saved the Mayor from the burning City Council building.

«My heart is as light as a child’s, a feeling I’d nearly forgotten. And by helping those in need, I will be able to keep that feeling alive.»
— Captain Marvel SHAZAM! : Power of Hope (2000)

Want to support me and Echoes of the Multiverse? Follow this link to subscribe or donate.

Post by MacynSnow » Wed Feb 07, 2018 12:38 am

Post by Shock » Wed Feb 07, 2018 1:48 am

Post by Arkrite » Fri Mar 16, 2018 5:16 am

This one always makes me smile over how silly it is.

Post by Arkrite » Fri Mar 16, 2018 5:20 am

Not really funny «Ha ha», but I enjoy this story because it reminds me of some of the strange and funny nonsense that happened to me while playing RPGs with total strangers.

Post by L-Space » Fri Mar 16, 2018 7:20 pm

Arkrite wrote: ↑ Fri Mar 16, 2018 5:16 am This one always makes me smile over how silly it is.

Post by Bladewind » Fri Mar 16, 2018 11:41 pm

Sometimes, its about a roll that makes a role fun.

We had a cocky and annoying player in our group that always rode to the rescue, stole thunder and was an all around jerk. My ranger was becoming a mascot as a result, despite actually being higher level. It was annoying. I`d try and do something, he’d one-up. And not just me. DM tried to quell it, but the guy was rules-lawyering.

DM grabs and tugs my shirt, gestures over to someone else.

Post by FuzzyBoots » Sat Mar 17, 2018 12:45 am

I don’t have many for myself, but I did run into an amusing Mutants and Masterminds mine entitled How a Street Thug Beat a God.

As with most such stories (including several of the ones that have been cited), it more or less relies on someone minmaxing, and the GM agreeing to go along with their insanity even when it alienates the other players, although honestly, this group had it coming.

Post by Ares » Sat Mar 17, 2018 1:22 am

And now, the Spoony One’s story of showing a bunch of Vampire players why «beating up the new guy, duct taping him to a chair, torturing him with a blowtorch and threatening to mind-screw him into joining their faction» is not proper «welcome the new player» etiquette.

«My heart is as light as a child’s, a feeling I’d nearly forgotten. And by helping those in need, I will be able to keep that feeling alive.»
— Captain Marvel SHAZAM! : Power of Hope (2000)

Want to support me and Echoes of the Multiverse? Follow this link to subscribe or donate.

Post by Ares » Sat Mar 17, 2018 2:08 am

There’s an old Tomb of Horrors story that I’ve heard that I got quite a kick out of.

For those that don’t know, back in the day, D&D sponsored conventions use to have «Tournament Modules», which were basically meat grinders player groups would have to fight through, getting scored on things like time, number of surviving original party members, etc. Well, at a few conventions people bragged within ear shot of Gary Gygax, (you know, the grand daddy of D&D) that his modules were a breeze to get through.

So Gary decided he’d write the most sadistic Tournament Module he could. He called it Tomb of Horrors, and it was infamous for being a nightmare for D&D players of the day. Gary basically filled the thing with all kinds of instant death traps where you either made your save or you died instantly, so your character’s hit points didn’t really matter. Hell, heroes had a 2/3 chance of getting instantly killed just entering the Tomb.

Furthermore, there wasn’t a whole lot in the way of mobs to fight, or gear to gain, so your characters really didn’t level up over the course of the adventure. So it was a module that was 99% traps with a couple of fights, including a boss fight where you needed to supply your own magic gear to defeat him. The Tomb didn’t have some vault with an Infinity +1 Sword that could help smite the last boss. Or at least, not one that Gary had thought of.

See, one of the traps is this crown/scepter combo that they find in a room with instructions that if you someone wears the crown and you touch the end of the scepter to the crown, you gain some permanent stat bonuses. However, the scepter has two identical sides, and if you touch the wrong end to the crown, the person wearing it just flat out dies. No save, you dead.

Well, one party knew about this, and took the crown with them out of that room, rather than leaving it there like most would. And when they encountered the boss, the Rogue snuck up behind the boss and put the crown on his head. And then the group’s best Fighter said, «I touch the crown with the bad end of the scepter.»

The GM running the module was flabbergasted. Luckily, Gary was at the convention the module was being run at, and someone went get him. When the situation was explained, Gary thought about it for a moment, smiled, then said, «Yep. Bad guy’s dead.»

After that, the module got re-written so that the crown and scepter couldn’t be removed from the room. But they had to re-write that module a lot. Originally, to create these impassible doors the players couldn’t just beat down, they were said to be made of Mithril and Adamantine. Some industrious players instead said, «Screw the Tomb» and spent days excavating the Mithril doors from the walls and leaving the dungeon with them, since they now had ten foot tall, 6″ thick slabs of Mithril they could sell to the dwarven kingdoms for an insane amount of money and get filthy rich. Re-writers of the module said that the doors were magically enchanted «to mimic the properties of Mithril» and would become normal steel if they left the tomb.

«My heart is as light as a child’s, a feeling I’d nearly forgotten. And by helping those in need, I will be able to keep that feeling alive.»
— Captain Marvel SHAZAM! : Power of Hope (2000)

Want to support me and Echoes of the Multiverse? Follow this link to subscribe or donate.

Roleplay / The Ballad of Edgardo

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«The Ballad of Edgardo» is an account of a forum RPG posted to 4chan in 2013 by the player of the eponymous character.

In-universe, it is the epic tale of two underdogs’ desperate struggle against jerkass Powers That Be that have made them Cosmic Playthings, and a Crapsack World dominated by an oppressive Evil Overlord named «Miltant Xer0» note and yes, that is how it’s «supposed» to be spelled and his legion of dark and edgy bishie murder hobos.

Out of universe, it is a stark reminder of how one pissed-off Real Man can stir up a nest of self-aggrandizing Thespians, «Stop Having Fun» Guys, Killer GMs and one power-mad Munchkin via a good dose of Loophole Abuse that would make the likes of Old Man Henderson proud.

So what happened? Well, it all started one fine day when Anon comes across an RP forum, which at first glance seems to be every internet-lurking teenaged Otaku’s dream; a sort of action/fantasy fighting setting that Anon himself describes as «animu: the game.» So Anon checks in, creates his character (the titular Edgardo, a hot-blooded, bare-fisted brawler) and enters the world, ready for adventure.

Only to find out two unfortunate things. One, most of the players in this world have apparently gone for making antiheroic, «dark swordsman»-type characters that are so edgy it could make bad boys like Sasuke or Sephiroth roll their eyes, and two. Edgardo’s build is utterly useless. Fists get no damage multipliers and therefore do nothing against even the lightest armor, and he couldn’t even make up the difference by using elemental attacks because he had unwittingly taken a perk that locked him out of elemental attacks (he had neglected to read the fine print). He was limited to using «Raw Spirit», which ignored all defenses but did such pathetic damage that it hardly even mattered. After Edgardo finds these two facts out the hard way, he quickly runs afoul of «Miltant Xer0», a senior member of the RP whose edginess puts the others to shame, and whom quickly beats poor Edgardo within an inch of his life and leaves him in the woods.

Thankfully, it is here that Edgardo meets «A Guy Called Squid», a squid-human Beast Folk who quickly befriends and fixes Edgardo up. But Edgardo doesn’t back down from a fight so easily. Edgardo doesn’t run away from a challenge. Edgardo will see Xer0 and his cronies fall to their knees, and with A Guy Called Squid at his side, the pair set off to do the impossible, come what may, and free this world from the tyranny of these so-called antiheroes.

The story can be read in its entirety here. A Dramatic Reading with added pictures can be found here. See also Old Man Henderson and That Guy Destroys Psionics, which are similar tales of game derailment.

The story contains examples of following tropes:

You All Meet in an Inn

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The stereotypical opening to an adventure in tabletop RPGs: the protagonists are all gathered by prior intent or a «coincidence» of authorial fiat by the Game Master in an inn, bar room, or other common public meeting spot. Once there, Messenger some mysterious stranger or NPC of varying dubiousness will approach them with some job offer or plea for assistance. These strangers tend to seat themselves in the darkest corner of the tavern for some reason (probably to make themselves seem even more mysterious). Thus do our heroes receive their ticket to board the plot.

Careful, though, for the mysterious stranger has an odds-to-even chance of being the Big Bad or a similar miscreant. Expect a Bar Brawl or two in the tavern as well, particularly if the PCs start to get rowdy. Fortunately, though, the barkeep is usually a retired former adventurer willing and able to kick the asses of anyone who gets too uppity.

This trope is Older Than Print — no less an author than Chaucer had his adventuring party meet in an inn — but it later began to be considered a Discredited Trope through overuse. Actually starting an adventure with the words «So, you all meet in an inn. » may be seen as roleplaying’s equivalent to «It Was a Dark and Stormy Night. » Thus, a lot of sources advise against using it, and give pointers on how to avoid it. The 3rd Edition Dungeon Master’s Guide for Dungeons & Dragons, in a list of ways to bring a party together, dubs this «The Cliche». David Morgan-Mar, of Irregular Webcomic! and Darths & Droids fame, provides a list of less overused ways to start an adventure, as do the folks at the dice of doom blog.

On the other hand, cliched as it may be, it really is a logical opener. Taverns are the center of social life in many cultures, making for a good place to meet new people, and food and drink are good for bonding with new acquaintances. Some people even use the trope deliberately as an invocation of gaming tradition. It’s also quite easy to play for laughs, emphasizing the comedy potential of enjoying a few pints down at the pub and deciding to go out and slay a dragon with your new-found acquaintances.

Real Life group meetings at an inn are usually a convention of some description. The «adventuring» usually takes place entirely within the building, and does not normally involve bloodshed, swordplay or dragons. Normally.

Compare You All Meet in a Cell. Contrast Closed Circle, for when the DM wants to keep you in the tavern.

Examples