What tips would you share to deal with a difficult customer

Customer Service Skills:
Dealing with Difficult Customers

Facing a difficult customer, whether in person, on the telephone or via direct messaging, email or social media, is many people’s worst nightmare. If talking to customers is part of your role, however, it is almost inevitable that you will have to deal with a difficult customer sooner or later. Learning how to manage those conversations will be a useful skill for the future.

Difficult customers are not just encountered when they make a complaint, although this is often the case. Sometimes, though, the most difficult customers to satisfy are those who have contacted the company for the first time, because you have no history with them, and therefore have less information about how to treat them. For those customers, it is doubly important to listen carefully to what they are telling you, because that will give you important information.

This page discusses how to deal with difficult customers in general, with some information about particular situations. These include, for example, on the phone, and dealing with complaints.

The Key to Good Customer Service

Our page on Customer Service Skills explains that the key to good customer service is simple:

You have to focus on the customer, and what they need and want from you, at all stages of the relationship: before, during and after a purchase.

This applies with difficult customers as well, if not more so.

The Number One Rule of Dealing with Difficult Customers

There is one primary rule when dealing with difficult customers: don’t make a bad situation worse.

It may, therefore help to consider what might make the situation worse for the customer. In other words, what is going to make an already angry or frustrated person more angry or frustrated? This list covers some of these issues:

Not listening to what they are saying – or being perceived not to be listening. You can show that you are listening by responding with ‘fillers’ such as ‘yes, I see’, and ‘uh huh’ periodically, as they speak. If you are typing as you listen, it is a good idea to explain that you are making notes about their issue, so that they do not think that you are getting on with other work, and just letting them vent. It is also helpful to check your understanding by reflecting and paraphrasing, as this shows very clearly that you were listening.

Not acknowledging their feelings, or that they have a reason to complain. We all like to have our feelings acknowledged, and it is a relatively simple thing to do. It puts you on the customer’s side, and makes it less likely that they will be angry with you. It also gives you more time to think about how you are going to respond. Use phrases such as:

“I can tell that you’re very frustrated by this situation, and I can understand that.”

“I can hear that you’re really angry about this, and I am very sorry that you have had to go through this.”

Not letting the customer explain the problem. It can be tempting to jump straight in and start to answer the customer, as soon as there is a pause in their speech. Don’t. Wait until you are sure that they have finished, and take time to check that you have really understood the problem by asking them questions and summarising the situation.

Making excuses or getting defensive. There is nothing quite so annoying as someone who is making excuses. Don’t do it. Your customer probably doesn’t care why something went wrong, or whose fault it was, they just want it put right. Focus on how to improve the situation, rather than explaining it.

Promising too much and then having to backtrack. It can be tempting to promise the earth, just to stop your customer from shouting at you. It is, however, going to make things much worse if you then have to backtrack and explain that, actually, you have no power to deliver a new product tomorrow. Only promise what you can actually deliver. If anything, under-promise, and over-deliver.

Not explaining what is going on or disappearing for long periods. If you have to leave your customer, perhaps to go and talk to your manager about what is possible, explain what is happening:

“I need to talk to my manager about what can be done, so please wait here, and I will be back as soon as I can. I’m sorry, it may take me a few minutes to locate her, so please don’t worry if I am gone ten minutes or so.”

“I need to talk to someone in Accounts about this. Would it be OK to put you on hold while I do so, or would you rather that I called you back?”

“I need to talk to my manager about this, but he’s on another call right now. Could I take your details, and call you back in about half an hour?”

Trying to guess what they want, and how to resolve their complaint or issue. It sounds simple, but many difficult customers are made more difficult because nobody has asked what they actually want. They may simply want to be heard. The best way to find out what your frustrated customer wants is to ask them. Try saying something like:

“I can see that this is frustrating for you. How can we best resolve it, in a way that will work for you?”

“I am so sorry you had such a bad experience. What can we do to put it right?”

Our guest post on Dealing with Customer Complaints contains other suggestions about how to take a complaint, and also what to do next. It also contains some tips for dealing with complaints, including keeping records of all interactions, and providing comprehensive staff training for anyone who deals with customers.

Dealing with Difficult Customer Telephone Calls

Dealing with difficult customers is doubly hard on the phone, because you do not have any visual clues—and neither do they. It is therefore harder to build rapport, and you are also unable to use body language mirroring or other standard techniques.

You have to work much harder with the main tool at your disposal: your voice.

Your voice has to convey your emotion, whether pleasure at speaking to the customer, or sympathy with their issue. Because so much of our meaning is conveyed by body language, you may have to exaggerate your tone of voice on the telephone to ensure that your meaning is understood. This can feel artificial at first, but it does work.

There is more about tone of voice, and other aspects of speaking in our pages on Effective Speaking, and Non-Verbal Communication: Face and Voice.

TOP TIP! Smile…

Believe it or not, smiling can be ‘heard’ over the telephone.

People can tell if someone they are talking to is smiling. Your voice sounds different, and you come across as warmer and more welcoming. It is therefore good to answer the phone smiling, particularly if you often answer it to customers trying to make a complaint or resolve an issue!

There is more about some of the issues specific to telephone calls with difficult customers in our guest post Dealing with Difficult Customer Calls.

Generic Skills, Different Types of Customers

Every customer, of course, is not the same. The skills required for dealing with difficult customers, however, are generic. They will usually work with most customers.

There may, however, be some specific situations where you need a slightly different approach. Our guest post on Difficult Customers provides a useful and fun infographic to identify different types of difficult customers, and suggests some specific approaches that may be useful.

5 Tips to Deal with Difficult Customers

The guy that yells over you while you’re trying to handle his complaint.

A family that insists that each member gets to speak to every member of management until they get a full refund.

The woman that insists she ordered double foam in her latte and complains about it until her coffee goes cold.

We’ve all dealt with difficult customers and have walked away frustrated, heartbroken, or swearing we’d never work another day in our life. People are part of any business and customers, for better or for worse, are the reason that we have a job in the first place. How do you learn to deal with difficult customers appropriately?

The answers to dealing with difficult customers go beyond conflict resolution or anger management. There are vital things to do as a company to ensure that your next difficult customer isn’t the downfall of your business. As with anything important to the core of your business, this requires a measured strategy.

Why Difficult Customers Still Matter

It’s no secret that acquiring new customers costs five times more than retaining current ones. A business that understands this well and implements a customer experience strategy to retain those existing customers don’t only keep a customer base. They see a substantial profit. Increasing customer retention by 5% can increase profits from 25-95%; it pays to push through growing pains with existing customers. In addition to your bottom line, customers affect these key factors:

Difficult customers talk. The next time you’re tempted to get in the last word with that angry customer, think about their sphere of influence. Customers, happy and unhappy, share their good and bad experiences with friends and family. With endless digital and social media outlets at their fingertips, disgruntled customers have a platform to share their feelings and opinions. It doesn’t take a lot of bad press for an unfavorable shadow to fall over a business.

The other great insight that a difficult customer can provide, although we usually only see it in hindsight, is the ability to see systems that are no longer serving the business or the customer. A freshly launched complaint sucks the complacency out of the room and gets the problem-solvers going. Run through last month’s call log or list of emails and see what you can learn.

What to do About Difficult Customers

Your marketing team is up to date on the strategy for the quarter and your accounting team has communicated the financial expectations to the board. But you may still be missing opportunities if your customer service strategy has yet to be solidified.

The customer service guidelines that your company has in place are just as important as any other strategy you employ. It’s vital that your business uses best practices when handling difficult customers. These guidelines for dealing with difficult customers need to be presented to all employees and updated as needed. An annual training or orientation needs to be held to address any changes made to the guidelines and to discuss how those guidelines can improve. Knowing the best way to deal with difficult customers can teach you how to build customer loyalty.

Additionally, you can also put safeguards in place to provide next-level customer support, like employing a Chatbot to help gain customer feedback and nurture those that may not have had the best experience. In your ManyChat dashboard, you can set up a flow that not only gathers customer feedback but shuffles them to the right place should their experience have been less than ideal. For those who are really upset, you can get their phone number and text them a special coupon code to help remedy any negative situations. This helps to handle customer complaints directly and shows customers that you want to address their concerns and solve the issue at hand.

5 Ways to Address a Difficult Customer

Unfortunately, experiences with a disgruntled customer can be completely unpredictable. Despite the unease that comes with not knowing when a difficult situation will arise, there are best practices that you can keep in your tool belt as you need them. Make the following tips your priority and ensure that they’re included in your customer service training. Remember that every single employee is responsible for ensuring the best customer service experience.

1. Practice active listening

Therapists use active listening skills with their clients — because it works. You may not be able to resolve an angry customer’s complaint, but you can give them your full attention. Active listening is a great tool to use because it allows the customer to feel truly heard. The other advantage of active listening is that it trains you to be a better listener and helps you empathize with them. Instead of a simple apology, active listening makes the situation personalized to the client/customer. For example: “Rachel, I hear that you’re frustrated that your shipment is delayed. I understand that you placed that order last Thursday and never received a shipping confirmation. Is that correct?”

2. Demonstrate emotional control.

Difficult customers come to the table with a lot of emotional charge. Not all customers will be belligerent or angry, but a difficult customer sure can bring those emotions out in you, too. You may feel infuriated at the customer’s condescending tone or their disregard for your hard work. Demonstrating emotional control is necessary for difficult customer situations because, at the end of the day, your interactions with them are going to add to your brand’s overall customer experience and reputation. Taking the high road means maintaining control of your effect, tone, and body language.

3. Go into performance mode.

The sure way to know that you won’t let your own emotional response to a disgruntled customer get to you is tapping into your inner performance mode. Imagine that you’re 15 minutes into a customer service call with a very difficult customer. They’ve asked the same question 10 times and won’t hang up until you fix it all. Your patience has worn thin and your lunch break is approaching. Now imagine that your boss is sitting with you at your desk. They’re privy to the whole conversation and are watching your reaction. Sometimes having a sense of accountability can aid in keeping things professional.

It also helps to remember that word-of-mouth marketing is very influential, and one bad apple is usually quick to make a lot of noise and tell anyone about their experience who’ll listen. To save yourself from a bad review or bad press, try and handle their complaints as professionally as possible. In most cases, customers will understand and it can blow over.

4. Agree to disagree.

You’re looking at the customer’s order and can clearly see that they purchased the large and not the small. They insist that there was a mixup in the warehouse. Is it worth running in circles without an end in sight? When it comes to measuring customer satisfaction, sometimes it’s best to let some things go so as not to risk your reputation. Make sure that your company has a clearly outlined policy on returns and refunds for your customer service reps to abide by. In most cases, erring on the side of pleasing the customers will result in favorable customer reviews and customer retention.

5. Offer a Remedy

In most cases, remedying a situation-gone-south with some sort of reward or giveaway tends to soothe your customer’s frustration. You may have seen this in situations where a customer was dissatisfied with their order at a restaurant and the restaurant took it off their bill. Offering a discount, free product, a return, or store credit, is a great way to make things right and build rapport.

6. Don’t take it personally.

Easier said than done, but imperative to know. Customers are often upset because of difficult circumstances in their personal lives. Stress certainly doesn’t bring out the best in most of us. Customer service experiences or unwanted stressors with a purchase just adds fuel to the fire. The best balance to an overreaction is to stay calm and realize that the interaction isn’t personal.

Quick Assessment

Which of these best practices does your company implement already? Are there other tips that you would add? Think of a time that you used one of these skills to deflect an otherwise intense situation with a customer. What went well? Is there anything that you would do differently? What is customer lifetime value and how can you improve it?

The key to implementing a customer service strategy that defuses even the most dissatisfied customers is to learn from past instances, record key observations, and put a plan in place for the future.

Key Takeaways

Difficult customers can be tough to deal with. Unfortunately, it’s an inevitable aspect of the business.

You don’t have to handle difficult customers with perfection, but professionalism is key. You can save yourself from difficult customer situations by employing a customer service strategy that diffuses negative scenarios before they escalate. You may employ chat support, a consistent customer support strategy, or just listen to customer feedback and make adjustments as needed. There are a lot of things you can do to save yourself from the negativity of handling difficult customers. Start by learning from these experiences and letting it roll off your shoulders.

Examples of Dealing With Difficult Customers

No matter where you fall on the chain of command, it is likely you will have to deal with a difficult customer situation. If these tough situations make you feel uncomfortable, not to worry. We have a list of tips to help turn those difficult conversations into loyal customers.

Tips For Dealing With Difficult Customers

Take A Step Back & Apologize

Apologizing is very important. If you are able to take a breath and think through a series of deliberate steps, you may be able to “de-escalate” things. The key is to put yourself in the customer’s shoes. Rather than viewing the scenario as a personal attack, see the bigger picture of how you are dealing with a customer whose needs have not been met.

Always apologize and be willing to put their needs first, even if you don’t always agree with their opinion. If the customer is upset, they deserve an apology. It may be possible that you have a potential solution you can offer but it all starts with letting the customer know you are sorry first and let them know that you empathize with their situation.

Leaving Things On A Better Note

When ending a conversation with a customer, don’t forget to ask if there is anything else you can be of help with. The customer may have been so focused on one particular issue or problem that they forgot about a second problem they also wanted to bring to your attention.

Asking to solve more problems is an easy way to remind the customer of any other problems, which will save both your teams’ and the customer’s time.

Show gratitude; despite any problems, the customer may have had and the stress you might be feeling, try to demonstrate that you appreciate their business. You may be surprised at the subtle way this can aid in winding down a situation. Don’t forget that they chose your business over the other options available to them!

Here are some examples of common customer service scenarios you may encounter in your business, and how to get moving back in the right direction for both you and your customer.

Difficult Customer Service Scenarios

Impatient Customer

Scenario:

A customer who feels they have been waiting too long for their product or service. Sometimes, circumstances arise that means a customer is waiting longer than usual. How do you handle those who get particularly upset about it?

Tips:

The first thing is to apologize. Next, explain as best as you can the reason behind the wait, and let the customer know that you are working on resolving the issue.

Another important tip is to use positive language. Instead of an apology like “our supplier is out of stock, there’s nothing we can do,” something like “we’re working with our supplier to get that back in stock as soon as we can”find the silver lining in a bad situation.

Explain the reason behind the wait, and let the customer know that you are working on resolving the issue as fast as you can. You can go an extra step and ask the customer to leave their contact info so someone can follow up with them when things are ready.

Indecisive/Quiet Customer

Scenario:

You have a customer who is close to purchasing but they seem very unsure about which option they should choose.

Tips:

Try to get them to verbalize their concerns. Are they worried about price? Maybe they are trying to figure out how a service visit will fit into their schedule. Once you can get them talking, you can better refine which options will work best for them overall.

Vague Customer

Scenario:

A customer feels like they know what they want, but seems to have difficulty expressing it.

Tips:

This customer scenario puts an extra burden on you and your customer service representatives to gain more information about their needs. Think about what details you and your team need to know in order to better be of service.

Don’t be afraid to ask questions. A statement like “sorry, but we just need a few more details to work on your request” could be a good opener. Follow it with a specific list of questions.

Customer Is Unhappy With Service

Scenario:

Sometimes, a customer is simply not pleased with what they’ve been given. Complaints will happen.

Tips:

Apologizing is again the first step to take (whether it seems like their complaint is justified or not). Attempt to resolve any specific issues within a limited time frame, balancing their complaint against your time and the needs of your other customers. Try to find a way to offer a solution. If you can’t, you may be able to offer a discount to keep them as a customer.

You Don’t Have An Answer

Scenario:

Perhaps a unique or unusual situation has arisen, and you do not have an immediate answer for the customer about how to proceed. Simply saying that you don’t know won’t cut it.

Tips:

The correct way to handle it is to let the customer know that you are going to research the options available and get back to them as soon as you can. It is important to follow through and truly respond in a timely manner. Even if time has passed and you still don’t have an answer yet, you can still send a quick message to your customer to let them know that you are still working on a solution.

You Made A Mistake

Scenario:

It happens sometimes. Everyone makes mistakes, but it can be especially embarrassing in a professional setting.

Tips:

Put ego aside, and honestly evaluate the situation, as objectively as possible. Apologize, and let them know that you acknowledge an error was made.

Being truthful is important in a case like this. Let your customer know that you are working to fix the mistake, and how long it will likely take to be resolved. Show empathy to the customer, and let them know that you would be frustrated too if you were in their place.

The “Their Way Or The Highway” (Demanding Customer)

Scenario:

Unlike a vague customer, occasionally you may encounter a customer who feels they know what they want so well, they refuse to hear about any alternatives (even if there are options that might actually work better for them). They appear to be set in their ways.

Tips:

Be respectful of their wishes, and appreciate the fact that they’ve put some time into thinking things over. Politely let the customer know there are other choices available. After that, let them decide how they want to go forward. The most important thing in a situation like this is to be an available source of information. The final choice still rests with the customer.

You Need To Transfer/Refer The Customer To Someone Else

Scenario:

The customer has an issue that is outside your area of expertise, but you think you know who can take care of their problem for them. How do you transfer or refer them to that other person without making the customer feel like they are being brushed off or ignored?

Tips:

The response is to externalize a sense of confidence that you can pass on to them. Instead of a deflated-sounding line like “I’m not sure, let me go ask someone else,” use positive language like “we have a team member who is great at solving problems like these; let me refer you to them.” Whenever possible, fill in your colleague about the details of the customer’s problem, so there is a limited amount of repetition on the customer’s part. They will appreciate you saving them the time and trouble of explaining their issue all over again.

The Customer Requests Something That Can’t Be Fulfilled

Scenario:

In most cases, it is good policy to go the “extra mile” and give something to the customer that they request, even if it is out of the ordinary rulebook procedure. Sometimes, though, it simply isn’t possible. For example, the customer leaves a feedback message asking for an additional service that upper management have no immediate plans to add. Or perhaps the customer asks for an extension on a payment deadline that is set in stone. These are just some examples of a few awkward scenarios where a customer service representative may feel like their hands are tied.

Tips:

You have to find a way to gently turn the customer down. Tell them the truth of the matter as best as possible as to why their request cannot be fulfilled. If you can, offer some kind of compromise solution if one appears to be available. Maybe the customer is asking for a discount when no promotions are currently running. Perhaps none are available now, but you can let the customer give you their contact info and you can follow up with them when a discount becomes available for them to use.

The Customer Is Overdue on a Payment

Scenario:

It’s been a little while since payment was due and you haven’t heard anything from the customer.

Tips:

Before sending things off to a collections department or outside collections agency, take the opportunity to follow-up one last time by phone or email (or both). Unless there are outside circumstances to show otherwise, a lack of payment could just be an honest mistake or simple forgetfulness on the part of the customer. Having that extra communication shows you care about the customer and aren’t simply looking for another payday.

The Customer Wants A Full Refund

Scenario:

You have tried other means of attempting to remedy a customer’s issue and they still demand a refund.

Tips:

The best course of action usually is to provide a refund. It can be a distressing situation to be in as a businessperson, but you should be prepared for it. Apologize to the customer, let them know you are placing a refund request, and let them know how long it should take before they see the money back in their account.

Overly Talkative Customer

Scenario:

This is a unique situation in that the customer might not be upset with your product or service. In fact, they might love it. The problem is they seem to have struck up a conversation with a customer service representative, and they don’t seem to plan on ending it any time soon.

Not every business might find this a problem. Zappos, the online shoe retailer noted for going above and beyond with their customer service philosophy, boasted once having a 10-hour phone conversation between a representative and a customer. They see it as a badge of honor and a sign of how loyal their customers are. You might not have the spare resources and staff to allow for something like that, however. How do you politely turn them away?

Tips:

One option is to shift the conversation to email. Let the customer know that the customer service representative they’ve been speaking to is needed elsewhere, but ask them for their contact info. The customer service representative can then follow-up with them at a later time. You may even be able to leverage the customer into leaving a testimonial or positive review for your business.

Very Angry Customer

Scenario:

When a customer is extremely angry, it can be the most difficult customer to work with because emotions are so high. At times, a customer is just so upset, there is no way to immediately respond.

Tips:

The key here is to listen. Any answer at this point may just be seen as an excuse, especially if this is an ongoing problem. Give the customer a chance to vent their frustration, and as mentioned above, try not to take it personally.

Apologize, as always. Let them know you understand that they are aggravated and frustrated. You must accept some responsibility for the way they are feeling, as a representative of your business or product. Don’t get caught in the wave of anger. Speak slowly and calmly; do not raise your voice. If possible, immediately begin work on some kind of solution and let them know you are making it a priority.

Conclusion

These are some examples of how to deal with difficult customers. If you need help our Broadly customer review software to get feedback from customers before they become a difficult problem. Following a plan of action like the ones we outlined can help you handle the rough situations you may find yourself in. Good luck!

How to Deal with Difficult Customers: 11 Proven Tips for Retailers

Quick take: Handling difficult customers is a tricky task, but you can greatly increase your chances of seeing a positive outcome by following a few key steps. In this post, you’ll learn:

Dealing with difficult customers can be… well, difficult, but it doesn’t have to be. With the right attitude and action steps, you can effectively navigate these tricky customer situations and emerge (hopefully) unscathed.

This post offers tips and insights to help you do just that. Our hope is by the end of the article, you and your staff will be more prepared to handle difficult shoppers.

1. Have the right mental attitude

Having the right mental attitude will help prevent your buttons from getting pushed and enable you to respond in a calm and professional manner.

Ricky Marton, founder of Be Robin Hood says that the most important thing to do when dealing with troublesome shoppers is to not let them see that they’re getting to you. “Once they realize they aren’t in charge, they’ll either leave or calm down and (hopefully) apologize.

2. Develop thick skin

Along with having the right mental attitude is developing a thick skin and training yourself and your team to not shrink from difficult retail situations.

“As a retailer, I have had a share of nasty encounters with retail customers. Initially, dealing with such customers was a difficult task but with time, I learned how to handle them,” shares Robin Luo of Rochehandle

He continues, “the most effective tip that has helped me to date is to develop thick skin. That is, to let go of fear. I started viewing difficult customers as a new challenge rather than a condemnation. Start assuming that these customers are preparing you for a better future.”

3. Hear the customer out and empathize with them

People who are upset need to be heard, so let your customers talk, and don’t interrupt them.

“Let the client vent about the situation if at all possible,” advises Carrie Thompson, Facility Manager at Affordable Mini Storage. “Don’t allow physical violence or threats (time to call the police!). Allowing a client to fully verbalize their complaint or anger is valuable. Many issues arise or escalate because the client didn’t feel like they’d been heard.”

Here are a few things to keep in mind when listening to customers:

Practice active listening

This will help make a good impression and it’ll allow you to really take in what the customer is saying, so you can (if possible) resolve their issue efficiently.

Active listening also entails that you listen with your whole body. This means using positive body language such as having an open stance and nodding along to show the other person that you’re listening.

Make them feel that they’re taken seriously

“Call your customer by name, if possible,” he adds. It makes people feel that they’re being heard and could help calm them.

Respond with empathy

“When someone yells at us, our natural response is usually to respond with either anger or go into defense mode. Avoid these at all costs,” says Fiona Adler, Founder at Actioned.com.

“Whether or not you think there’s a real problem, it’s real from the customer’s perspective, so the appropriate emotion for you to respond with is ‘empathy’. Say things like; ‘I can see why you’re disappointed’ or ‘Oh dear, that’s not what you would have expected’ or ‘I can understand why you’re upset.’”

4. Be mindful of your verbal and non-verbal cues

The things you say — and don’t say — can significantly affect the outcome of any customer interaction. Signs of boredom, impatience, or aggression will only escalate the situation. So, be very mindful of your words and the body language you project.

Here are a few tips to help you do just that:

Verbal

Evenson provides a handy list of phrases of courtesy that you can refer to. Check them out below and make it a point to incorporate them into your customer service vocabulary:

Non-verbal

Be careful with the non-verbal cues that you give off.

“Nodding, eye contact, and note taking are all excellent modes of silent communication. Most importantly, keep quiet. If you interrupt, the person will assume you are not listening and often feel the need to start over again. Patiently listen to the whole story.”

You should also avoid defensive or hostile gestures such as closed fists or folded arms as they could aggravate the customer.

For your reference, here’s a table you can refer to when it comes to the dos and don’ts of body language in retail:

5. Be discreet

Being tactful and discreet is crucial when dealing with difficult customers. Remember, other people are watching, and some may even whip out their smartphones to record the conflict. The last thing you want is for the incident to hit social media.

Johnson recommends that managers and associates speak in a slow and lowered voice. Strong emotions are infectious, so control your feelings and avoid doing anything that could further aggravate the situation.

And if possible, don’t deal with the situation on the sales floor. John Moss, CEO at English Blinds, recommends that you “discreetly remove the customer in question from an area where they can be seen/heard by other customers to minimize disruption and the potential for the interaction to impact on brand perception by other shoppers.”

“This can be achieved by inviting the customer to come to an office or somewhere quieter to talk properly, which also serves the dual purpose of making the customer feel important, and as if their complaint or issue is being handled with the appropriate gravitas,” he adds.

6. Communicate what you can and can’t to about their situation

Once you’ve heard what the customer has to say, you’ll need to talk to them about what you can and can’t do. Anne Miner of The Dunvegan Group recommends that you start by clarifying and apologizing.

“Once you have heard the story, ask questions to clarify where necessary. Then, apologize — tell the customer you are sorry they have had this experience, feel this way or whatever is appropriate.”

From there, proceed by communicating what you can and can’t do about their problem. Whatever you say, though, see to it that you do something.

“Never say: “There’s nothing I can do.” That statement is like gasoline on a campfire. Although it may range from simply gathering facts to solving the problem, there’s ALWAYS something you can do. If you are a member of the team, then all the work done for the customer is a reflection of the overall quality,” says Guest.

Miner echoes this advice. “Tell the customer what you CAN do for them — issue a refund, a credit, or connect them to the manufacturer.”

Now, what happens when you can’t bend to your customer’s wishes?

The best thing is to be upfront. Miner recommends saying something like: I wish I could do that for you. At this moment, that is beyond my authority but I will ask ______. May I have your phone number so I can get back to you?

Here’s an additional tip: if possible, let the customer know about the changes that you’ll make as a result of their complaint.

“Make the customer feel like they’ve made a difference,” advises Adler. “The last thing customers want is to feel like their feedback is going nowhere. Make sure that you let them know that you’re very grateful they alerted you to this problem. Then let them know the steps that will be taken to ensure the same thing won’t happen to other customers.”

7. Act quickly

If you can resolve the customer’s problem immediately, then, by all means, do so. This has several benefits:

For one, being able to quickly address a customer’s concerns may just turn their negative experience into a positive one. If you can get on top of things and satisfy the shopper, they might end up as a loyal customer who buys from you regularly and tells their friends.

Resolving a customer’s issue ASAP also prevents a situation from escalating. This is especially true if someone is complaining loudly inside your store.

As Nicole Reyhle wrote in her Forbes column, “when a customer is creating a scene in front of other customers, you should aim to resolve it as fast and quietly as possible… One of the main reasons for this is that any customer who becomes upset and loud about it in your business is likely the same type of person to talk about this experience with friends, family and other potential customers.”

8. Compensate for their discomfort (if necessary)

Taking this step isn’t always necessary and depends on the situation. For instance, if the issue is due to an error on your part, it may behoove you to do something extra for the customer.

Jason Perkins of San Diego SEO Firm suggests providing additional compensation to make up for any mistakes or issues.

“Give them something to compensate for the discomfort. When customers complain about something, either it has to do with your service or with the people who are working for you. If they feel that they are not being serviced properly, you have to give them something to make up for the mistake,” he says.

“Since I was a manager, I made it a point to give these customers a coupon, discount or maybe give them their item for free or give them a replacement.”

Magic Mind, the brand that sells the popular productivity drink, serves as an excellent example of how to properly (and swiftly) compensate customers who are having issues.

Here’s what happened: when my latest shipment ran into delays, the Magic Mind team immediately apologized rectified the situation by looking into the delivery issues, while shipping an additional order for free.

While the customer (i.e., yours truly) wasn’t being particularly difficult, the team at Magic Mind handled the situation exceptionally well.

9. Make a judgment call: Will you tolerate someone who’s being downright obnoxious or unfair?

If the situation reaches a point where the customer crosses the line and becomes downright rude and unfair, you’ll need to make a judgment call on giving them what they want versus “firing” them.

Yes, choosing the latter would mean that they’ll never shop with you again, but keeping a problematic customer can be just as bad.

As customer service and speaker Shep Hyken puts it, “if the customer crosses the line, it may be time to fire the customer, politely sending them on their way to the competition. A bad customer can hurt morale and make the working environment uncomfortable. Just as bad, a manager that won’t stand up to the customer and support his/her employees can have a negative impact as well.”

Here are some steps you could take when asking customers to leave:

10. Practice diffusing anger

Staying calm and empathizing with frustrated and emotional shoppers can be difficult, but it’s entirely doable if you practice. That’s why Johnson advises retailers to routinely conduct training sessions on diffusing anger.

“To better prepare your staff, a good strategy is to use interactive role-playing. Set up training sessions so that team members can practice dealing with angry and upset customers,” he says.

Johnson, who personally facilitated such sessions, shares that staff members always feel more empowered and comfortable after role-playing different scenarios. “It’s one thing to think – in your head — what you would do or say, but it’s a whole other thing when you actually have to articulate it out loud and practice what you need to do.”

11. Don’t forget about your employees

Make sure you have a solid team who can support your customer service efforts. Part of doing this means rewarding your employees for the hard work that they’ve been doing.

“Incentivizing workers to effectively handle difficult or irate customers raises the workplace’s overall morale and pushes higher standards of customer service. You can do this by implementing rewards systems, offering employee benefits, increasing wages, or by simply giving praise.”

Bonus: recognize that it’s best to prevent issues from arising in the first place

The best way to deal with difficult customer situations? Prevent them from happening in the first place. Here’s how:

Keep your store neat and adequately stocked

Keeping your store organized makes it easier for shoppers to navigate your location and get their hands on the things they need. This gives them a faster and more convenient in-store experience and decreases the likelihood that they’ll ask (or demand) for assistance.

Also, ensure that your shelves and fixtures are adequately stocked. Instruct your staff to routinely check your shelves for items that are running low so they can replenish immediately. Doing so helps customers find what they’re looking for quickly and easily, so they (and you) are less likely to feel inconvenienced.

Speed up customer service

Make sure your staff knows the importance of speed when serving customers. Many shoppers are extremely busy and have no time to wait around.

How you can you serve customers promptly without compromising quality?

Hire additional employees – Having added help can keep your store running smoothly during the hectic Christmas season. See to it that you have a good staff-to-customer ratio so you’re not making anyone wait. Remember, slow customer service is a huge consumer pet peeve. You’ll prevent a lot of headaches simply by being prompt.

Do note that hiring more people is just the first step. Equally important is ensuring that your staff is well-trained. Devote extra time educating your employees (especially seasonal hires) about the ins and outs of your store. They should know your sales floor and stockroom like the back of their hand so they can easily find the right products for shoppers.

Retail tech know-how also goes a long way, so see to it that your employees know how to quickly operate your equipment and retail software.

Speed up checkout

Many customer issues may also arise in the checkout area. From long lines to less-than-perfect payment technology, retailers need to anticipate and prevent potential problems that can occur when it’s time to ring up sales. Here are a few steps you can take to improve the checkout experience during the holidays (and beyond):

Use quick keys – Most modern POS systems provide product shortcuts or on-screen buttons that speed up how items are added to a sale at checkout. If your system has this capability, be sure to enable it and add your most popular items. That way, when a customer buys a product that’s already included in your quick keys layout, you can ring them up with just a tap of a button, instead of having to search for the item.

Vend Tip

Use integrated payments – Using a payment solution that integrates with your POS makes checkout a lot faster. Integrated payments allow sales to flow directly from your POS to your card reader. This means you won’t have to manually key in the transaction information into the card reader, so sales are processed much faster. Not only that, but integrated payments prevent human error and are more secure.

Enable contactless payments – While contactless payments such as Apple Pay aren’t as widespread as credit cards, a growing number of consumers have adopted them.

If you cater to a lot of these shoppers, start accepting contactless payments in your store. That way, people won’t have to fumble with cards or cash. All they need is their phone, and they’ll be good to go.

Add registers and untether the checkout experience – Always be prepared to open new registers when it gets busy. For instance, if your POS can run on a laptop or iPad, you’ll want to have extra devices in your store so you can quickly open a register when the lines get too long.

That’s what homeware store Borough Kitchen does in their business. “At peak times… we can add a new till instantly by switching on another iPad,” shares founders David Caldana & Justin Kowbel.

Consider doing the same thing in your stores. Equip extra iPads or laptops with your POS so you can quickly bring them out when it gets crowded in your shops. And if you’re using a tablet, you could even untether the checkout experience and ring up sales from anywhere in the store instead of being stuck behind the cash wrap.

Bottom line

Dealing with difficult customers isn’t easy, but it comes with the territory of running a retail store. Also, remember that something positive can also arise from these situations.

As Adler puts it, “Angry customers are one of the most challenging parts of running a business, but handled correctly, you really can turn these people into some of your strongest advocates. I’ve seen many cases where a mistake has been corrected and the customer has gone on to be extremely loyal to the business and refer lots of their friends as well.”

Do you have any other tips for handling difficult customers? Share your thoughts in the comments.

How to Deal With a Difficult (or Angry) Customer: 16 Tips

Download HubSpot’s Free Guide on How to Be a Great Customer Support Rep

Published: December 15, 2021

Crossed arms, heavy sighs, and short replies are some of the physical signs customers show when they’re losing interest in what you’re saying; and your shot at keeping their business might be fading fast.

Often, difficult or even angry customers aren’t expressing frustration with you. These emotions are tied to external situations and psychological stimuli. So, put your great communication skills to work, draw on your superpower of reading the situation, and use these eight psychological tips for managing difficult customers to save your customer from churning.

1. Practice reflective listening.

When you’re upset, does someone saying, «I understand,» make you feel better? I didn’t think so. This kind of broad statement will not calm the customer down. Take the following scenario:

Customer: «I’m frustrated because we have a limited budget and you’re unwilling to offer us a discount.»

Customer Success Manager: «I understand, but … «

You know the conversation above isn’t going to end well.

Instead, practice reflective listening. Reflective listening requires that you understand what the other person is saying by interpreting their words and their body language. Once you’ve analyzed the situation, then you respond by reflecting the thoughts and feelings you heard back to your customer.

Example of practicing reflective listening:

Customer: «I’m frustrated because we have a limited budget and you’re unwilling to offer us a discount.»

Customer Success Manager: «So, what I’m hearing is that our pricing is a barrier for your business. Your budget is tight, and I’m not offering a discount that meets your needs. Is that correct?»

If you’ve adequately understood their sentiment, move on. If not, say, «Tell me more, so I can better understand.» Never promise you’ll fix the situation — because you might not be able to. Your goal at this moment is to make your customer feel heard and valued.

2. Consider their affect heuristic.

The affect heuristic is a mental shortcut that helps you make quick and efficient decisions based on how you feel toward a person, place, or situation. It explains the fact that we all make decisions and judgments based on our worldviews and experiences.

In these situations, objective facts carry little weight for us. Instead, we run the decision or situation through our internal «software» and develop our own opinions based on what we already know. One’s affect heuristic is subjective and based on their past experiences.

If your customer keeps asking, «What’s the catch?» and delaying the onboarding process with rescheduling and endless due diligence, it might not be helpful to say, «You’ve already purchased an annual subscription for this marketing software. Can we move forward?»

Your customer could’ve had an experience where they unknowingly were trapped into a year-long contract with a vendor who did not deliver on their promises. Because of that experience, your customer is now viewing you through that lens.

Example of the affect heuristic:

Ask questions to understand the root cause of their apprehension. The questions below can help your customer relax, and yield insights into why they’re unwilling to move forward:

These questions also redirect their mind from thinking you’re untrustworthy to proactively considering what they need to move forward.

3. Tap into the beginner’s mind.

The beginner’s mind — also known as the zen mind — is the strategy of approaching every situation as if you were a beginner. When you adopt this way of thinking, you enter every conversation with the «don’t know» mind, which keeps you from prejudging a customer or their situation.

It also encourages you to live without «shoulds.» These are nagging thoughts like:

«Shoulds» put your mind on the defensive and jeopardize the productivity of the conversation before it even begins.

With the zen mind, you let go of being an expert. Sure, you’re an expert in your product/service, and you might be an expert in customer service, but you’re not an expert in this customer, their situation, or the conversation you’re currently engaging in.

Example of tapping into the beginner’s mind:

So, instead of saying, «You told me you wanted to increase your inbound lead generation by 20% by the end of this month, and these delays won’t make this possible» approach each conversation with the beginner’s mind. Don’t prejudge your customer’s frustration, forget about what they should have done, and view each conversation as a new puzzle to be solved.

Try saying, «It looks like with these delays, we won’t be able to meet our inbound lead generation goal. But, let’s see what we can do to get the results we’re looking for.» This approach acknowledges the problem but immediately begins working towards a solution.

4. Let go of fear.

Fear of a negative outcome drives many of our reactions. Commonly, fear makes us want to control things. If a customer is being difficult, there is a fear of challenging them and damaging the relationship. If a customer expresses displeasure with your timeline or pricing structure, the fear is we might not be able to fix the situation.

First, let go of the idea that you need to fix anything. When sitting down with a difficult customer, your job is to listen, understand, and discern the next steps; not immediately produce a solution.

Example of letting go of fear:

So, instead of apologizing, slapping together a mediocre fix, or validating feelings, say, «It’s unfortunate X happened. I’m aware of how this is affecting your business, and I appreciate your patience as I work to resolve this matter.»

5. «Chunk» the problem.

Chunking is the process of taking one big problem and breaking it into several smaller, more manageable portions. These small portions are easier for us to tackle, and make us more willing to begin dealing with the issue at hand. Many people use chunking to organize their daily tasks or help to manage challenging problems.

Example of «chunking» the problem:

Does your customer always have a reason why they can’t set up their account and get started using your software? At your next meeting, ask them to help you break down each of the final steps you need to take to get things moving. Simply seeing each task chunked can make it easier for your customer to digest what’s left to do.

6. Remember that anger is natural.

Ever thrown out a price or time investment required, and watched your customer become frustrated, maybe even angry, at how high it was? Or maybe you’ve been on the other side? A customer tells you how much they want to pay for your new product upgrade, and it’s so low it makes you mad.

The Recalibration Theory of Anger says this emotion is naturally wired into humans. In short, anger is our evolutionary way of bargaining. We furrow our brows, press our lips together, and flare our nostrils in to drive our «opponent» to place a higher value on what we have to offer.

Example of using anger to bargain with a customer:

When faced with an angry customer, avoid the (natural) tendency to justify your position. Instead, understand that they’re merely feeling undervalued and attempting to control the situation.

Take your customer’s frustration seriously, but not personally. Remain calm and actively listen to what your customer says. When you’ve confirmed you understand their frustration, thank them for communicating it, and tell them you’ll get back to them with a solution.

When a customer’s angry, no solution may make them feel better. Give them time to cool off, consult with your manager on the best way to move forward, and use our list of tips (further down the page) to help alleviate the situation.

7. Keep calm and carry on.

Conflict is a part of business and how you react under fire impacts the future of your customer relationships.

The adage, «The customer is always right» still rings true. You have far more to lose by taking the low road and stooping to a customer’s level of hostility.

Treating someone with disdain or disrespect can reflect negatively on you and your company, so reputation management should always be top of mind.

Remember, people will often mirror the emotional signals you emit. If you respond with hostility and anger, don’t expect friendliness and understanding in return.

Example of remaining calm:

Emotional intelligence can be used to calm the storm, so use these tips for navigating your next conflict:

HubSpot Director of Sales and 30-year sales veteran Dan Tyre says, «If you’re average, you’ll fall prey to emotion. If you’re great, you’ll realize the opportunity and raise your game. Lean in, understand where [they’re] coming from, listen closely, and have empathy.»

8. Use your support resources.

My colleague, Clint Fontanella, likes to call these «the weapons in your customer support arsenal.» These are the tricks you can use during a call, chat, or in-person interaction to deal with a difficult customer.

While they should be used on a case-by-case basis, here are a few resources your reps should learn to master:

Example of using your resources:

Let’s say one of your most-loyal customers calls your support team with a common problem but they’re convinced the issue is extremely complex. When you show them the proven solution, they insist that they’ve gone through the steps exactly how you outlined them. Now, they’re starting to get frustrated because they suspect you don’t trust that they followed your directions.

This is an excellent opportunity to use a strategic hold. Tell the customer you’d like to look into this issue to make sure that nothing is out of the ordinary with their product or service. You can tell them you’re performing diagnostics, referring to a colleague, or simply «running tests» to ensure things are working properly.

After a minute or two of sitting silently, return to the call and ask the customer to perform the troubleshooting steps again, but this time, do it together. This puts you in a win-win situation, because either you’ll spot the user error, or you’ll identify the abnormality without making the customer feel like they’re repeating steps for no reason.

These crucial steps all have one element in common in dealing with angry customers: listening. Listening to angry customers helps you understand how to interact with them in your business.

How to Deal with Angry Customers

1. Remain calm.

If a customer sends you an angry email or starts shouting at you on a phone call, it’s hard not to take that personally. You’ll likely instinctively feel a bristle of indignation and defensiveness as thoughts pop into your head of how wrong that customer is, how hard you work, and you’ll start to feel angry before you know it.

Instead, take a second to breathe and process what your customer is actually saying. In most cases, you’ll hear between the angry words that the customer is struggling or frustrated with your product or service, to the point where they have to take it out on somebody. Understand that everyone is human and experiences moments of weakness, and don’t take their anger personally or hold it against them.

That said, if a customer is so angry they’re being rude, abusive, or aggressive in tone or language, you don’t have to tolerate that behavior. If at any point in a customer conversation, feel free to escalate it to your manager for additional support.

Example of remaining calm

Let’s say a customer calls your support team and is upset about their delivery date. They’re agitated and are shouting for a manager the moment your rep picks up the phone.

This is where your rep should remain calm and try to identify the three «what’s»: «What’s the problem?» «What are the customer’s goals?» and «What are your options?» If your rep can keep their cool and determine these details, they’ll have a much easier time de-escalating an angry customer.

2. Practice active listening.

Pay close attention to the words the customer is saying, instead of focusing on the anger behind the words.

By actively listening, you’ll be able to figure out what’s making the customer so angry and how to resolve the issue, instead of simply trying to comfort them and de-escalate the interaction. You’ll be able to solve their problem and make them satisfied again sooner by paying close attention to the angry words so you can respond as quickly as possible.

Example of active listening

Let’s say a customer walks into your store and says, «Your product stopped working a few days after I purchased it. I’m really surprised how poorly it’s designed.»

Focus on the words this customer used, specifically the word «surprised.» This is how the customer described their feelings. They’re not angry but rather surprised by your product’s behavior.

In this case, you may be tempted to reply with something like, «I understand your frustration.» But, notice how this response escalates the customer’s feelings. You’re giving them permission to go from just feeling surprised about the issue to feeling frustrated that they’re on the phone with you.

Instead, demonstrate active listening by using the same language your customer is using. Say something like, «That certainly is surprising! Let’s see why your product has stopped working unexpectedly.» This response acknowledges the customer’s feelings without escalating their emotions.

3. Repeat back what your customers say.

A key part of active listening is making sure you and the customer are on the same page. Once you’ve determined the root cause of the anger, repeat back to the customer what you’re hearing to make sure you understand each other, and to let the customer know that their concerns have been heard and will be responded to.

Example of repeating what the customer says

4. Thank them for bringing the issue to your attention.

When your customer sounds angry and negative about a situation, thanking them for voicing their concern to you can go a long way toward building rapport with them. A simple thank-you to acknowledge their time and patience as you work to solve the issue will suffice.

Example of thanking a customer

The easiest way to thank your customer is to do it constantly. When the customer begins a service inquiry, thank them for reaching out to your team. When you’re working on a case and there’s a long period of silence, thank the customer for «bearing with you as you troubleshoot their case.» And, when a customer provides you feedback, either positive or negative, thank them for sharing their perspective and making your support team better.

5. Explain the steps you’ll take to solve the problem.

Make it clear to the customer what you’ll do to get started addressing their concern. Whether it’s something simple you can do over the phone, or if you’ll need to go through a process with them, spell out your next moves so the customer feels heard and at ease.

Example of explaining the steps to alleviate the problem

One way to do this is by creating a timeline for your customer. List out every step you’re going to take and when you expect to complete each one. This lets the customer know exactly what you’re doing and when they’ll have a resolution.

6. Set a time to follow up with them, if needed.

Sometimes, problems can’t be solved in just one phone call and might require you to sync with your manager or file an internal request with the product team. If this is the case, let the customer know why you can’t handle the issue on the phone with them, and instead give them a timeline of when they can expect to hear from you next.

The added benefit of this is that it will give the customer time to cool off, and it will give you time to get guidance and feedback from your manager about how to proceed.

Example of setting up a follow-up time

If you need to set up a follow-up time with a customer, the best thing you can do is explain why the break will benefit them. For example, if you need to speak with a product expert before you can troubleshoot, be transparent with your customer. Let them know that you can’t take any further steps until you hang up the phone and speak with your reference.

If the customer is uneasy about this proposal, reassure them by providing a contingency plan. Let them know exactly when you’ll reach out next and what information you expect to have by that time. This will help justify why a follow-up meeting is best for this case.

7. Be sincere.

Just as important as remaining calm when dealing with an angry customer, it’s important to be sincere, too. Customers can tell when they’re being spoken to in a patronizing or equally angry manner, so make sure your word choice and tone are deliberate and respectful. Nobody likes being talked down to, and even if the customer comes in hot with anger or a raised voice, make sure you take the high road to diffuse tension and make the customer feel like they’re being taken seriously.

Example of practicing sincerity

Sometimes customers will call you with a «problem,» but when your rep troubleshoots, it turns out to be user error. These situations can be tempting for reps to poke fun at customers who wrongly blamed them or your company for their misfortune.

However, it’s important to remember that the customer’s perspective dictates the quality of the service experience. Even if the customer is clearly at fault, it’s their opinion that gets shared on social media and review sites. These are the cases where your reps need to work extra hard to politely explain why an issue occurred and how it can be prevented going forward.

8. Highlight the case’s priority.

A common frustration for customers is the feeling that their support case isn’t important to your business. This is particularly prevalent for businesses that have large or international teams supporting their customer base. When your company is dealing with thousands of inquiries each day, some customers feel like their case is expendable and that your team can afford to provide an occasional poor experience.

It’s important to remove this feeling for your customer by highlighting how important the case is to you, your support team, and your business. Let them know what you’re doing to notify key stakeholders and how this communication will directly lead to a faster resolution. Even if it’s just one rep working on their case, the customer should feel like your entire support team is aware of their issue.

Example of highlighting the case’s priority

One situation where this is common is when putting customers on hold or asking to follow up with them. That’s because some customers feel like this is an excuse for the rep to avoid a stressful confrontation and put their case on the back burner.

In these cases, support reps need to justify their actions. They need to explain how your support process works and why a break is necessary for their case.

For example, they can say something like, «It looks like I need to speak with a product expert about this error. That’s going to require me to put you on hold to track them down, but the sooner I do that, the sooner I should have the tools I need to troubleshoot your case.»

This response demonstrates the significance of the problem and the steps you’ll need to take to troubleshoot it. You’re telling the customer that you know what you need to do, but you need more advanced tools and resources to do it. Now it becomes clear that the sooner you put them on hold, the sooner they’ll have their solution.

Is it worth it to deal with angry customers?

In short, yes. Dealing with angry customers can be difficult but angry, demanding, or hard to please customers are beneficial to your company’s success by providing opportunities to improve your business.

Angry customers give your team opportunities to practice their conflict resolution skills. Many customers want to be heard and for their problems to be understood. By actively listening to a customer’s concerns, you can see an alternative point of view on how your business can improve a product or service and help to improve the structure of your business.

No company is exempt from having difficult customers, but allowing your customers to be heard and understood can increase brand loyalty, product or services, and conflict resolution training skills.

How would you handle an angry customer?

Anger is a natural emotion, but by actively listening, being sincere, remaining calm, having follow-up times, and prioritizing a customer’s case, you will be able to handle angry or difficult customers in any situation.

Using anger as a tool to bargain with your customer to give them the best results for a situation at the time can increase rapport with your business. Dealing with unhappy customers is never easy. But, despite the headaches, angry customers are good for business — you just need to know how to relate to them and solve their specific needs.

Editor’s note: This post was originally published in August 2020 and has been updated for comprehensiveness.